Today, I was swimming my routine laps at the gym's pool and a man came in and swam in the adjacent lane. While swimming freestyle, I smelled a really nasty fart. Not a minute later, he hurriedly left. I didn't realize what he had done until I saw "floating particles" in the water. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my swim coach had me swim a 400 meter freestyle. Feeling a little sick near the end, I lifted my head to breathe, then burped, and threw up violently all in the pool. All my team mates screamed horrified running out of the pool, and now they have to drain it. I was told not to come back. FML
Today, I farted in a public pool and watched in horror as bubbles of death gas floated up beside my son who started calling me the fart monster in front of everyone. FML
Today, I went for a swim in the sea. It was early and I was the only one in the water. I swam out far, then my tummy rumbled big time. Next thing I knew, I'd shat my shorts. It went everywhere. I had to scoop the poop out with my hand and wash it off whilst swimming back to shore. I had to shower afterwards. FML
Today, I was at a pool party with my friends. I really had to pass gas so I moved a bit from the group and let it rip. Instead of bubbles surfacing a brown cloud of poo rose instead. FML
Today, I was swimming in the fast lane at the pool. A guy in blue trunks was swimming slowly and really getting on everyone's nerves. I took a break, and looking around I couldn't see him. I turned to the guy next to me and said, "Finally, Mr. Blue Trunks has f**ked off." It was Mr. Blue Trunks. FML
Today, in the gym, as I bent over to pick up my weights an old man farted right in my face. The stench was appalling. To make matters worse, a girl I've fancied for ages thought it was me and reported it to the instructor. I was told to leave for "anti-social behavior." FML
Today, at the pool, I tried to impress the hot lifeguard by doing the perfect dive. Afterward, I realized my shorts were floating through the water. FML
Today, I went swimming. While I was walking along side of the pool, everyone was staring at me. I began to think that my diet was really working. It was only an hour later, in the changing rooms, that I noticed the string from my Tampax that was sticking out of my swimming costume. FML
Today, while working as a lifeguard, a kid took a dump in the pool. When I told everyone to clear the pool so we could clean it, another kid promptly stared at me, stood at the shallow end right where I was standing, pulled down his trunks, and peed on my feet. FML
Today, I went swimming at a public pool. When I dove in, my speedos decided they’d had enough of me and slipped right off. I spent a minute underwater debating my life choices before realizing they’d floated to the shallow end, right next to a group of giggling kids. FML
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Top comments
TechnoKitten 17
Some people are just disgusting.
AndrewMoreira14 19
Oh my god I hope you took like 5 showers after that...
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Comments (104)
goaliestud30 23
That sounds shitty
jacob_coryell98 8
He took crop dusting to a whole other level.
Rainbow2Cloud 12
Would you look at that, both of the first two comments are overused puns.
raesos91 26
He was going freestyle too! Or should I say, "floaterstyle!"
santosb1 11
No, you shouldn't say that either.
sstahpp 33
Please. Don't.
krazayman 18
fml's comments are getting worser and worser
swaglesshipster 23
What a crappy situation
laurenhem 26
What a crappy pun
stingray112 24
Nasty freestyle?
cybRuser 16
What the heck is your username
AndrewMoreira14 19
Oh my god I hope you took like 5 showers after that...
tantanpanda 26
I took an hour shower after that.
annie_zoo 27
forget the shower, I'd go for 10 gallons of bleach.
Idio49 8
no need to overreact
dragonrider1959 18
Suicide isn't the answer
danimal_crackerz 26
Maybe try adding s few 0s?
TechnoKitten 17
Some people are just disgusting.
Welshite 40
There's a new study out that says eye irritation from swimming pools is mostly caused by urine in the water. Also, people with diarrhea swim and manage to sicken others. Public swimming pools are wonderful things aren't they?
Iarla_ceapaire93 24
I highly doubt he did it on purpose...
slayertack 19
"Today, while swimming in the public pool, I accidentally sharted." I hope we see this FML soon.
Brandi_Faith 34
I honestly feel really bad for the guy. It's not like he planned on going to the pool and crapping himself. He must've been so embarrassed! And let's be honest, what can you do but run away as quickly as possible? It's not like owning up that the diarrhea is yours can make the situation any better. He had no other option other than running. We've all had situations where diarrhea or bowel issues have you running to the bathroom and just making it in time. It sounds like in this situation, the diarrhea won. Poor guy. And yes, definitely f op's life too!
CommentKing207 23
I'm sorry that had to happen OP, I wish people would say sorry when that happens instead of running away
CommentKing207 23
Not just say sorry, but to go to lengths to even clean the pool. That's disgusting.
ShowMeKay 20
I think the running away was out of necessity. Had to finish the job somewhere else lol
dpxantos 10
Could have seen a few Snickers bar size chunks floating around, could have always been worse OP.
lulinator 40
I think particles are worse. Snickers bars you can scoop up. Kind of hard to scoop up small floaties. My stomach is heaving just writing/thinking about this.
MrConcise 35
Probably much more embarrassing for him. Have you ever shat yourself in public? He's gonna have nightmares for months.
Brandi_Faith 34
Poor guy won't enter a pool for years!
jerryj 27
Maybe it's better that way.
Welshite 40
That's when you imitate Caddyshack and eat a Baby Ruth candy bar.
Doubtful_Judge 23
If you're suggesting that op eats the person's feces, that is disgusting and you need to re-evaluate your life.
Welshite 40
"...eat a Baby Ruth candy bar."
devildog562 33
Hahaha . It touched my forehead.
LetsNotForget 22
Who knew that a pool could double as a toilet
slingerslasher 24
I think the whole point is that it doesn't.
Quetzal27 12
Okay so that really sucks, faith in humanity declines even more. Side note: Who in their right mind thinks that OP deserves this occurring?
molloytony 2
I think that has to do with faith in humanity declining.... Or miss clicks :P
MrConcise 35
New here, #10?
mswhatever 18
I highly doubt the guy ment to do this. He was probably very embarrassed as it is.