Today, during swimming in PE, I kept noticing a stinging feeling on my scrotum. Every time I jumped into the water I would feel a sharp stab. After the full hour of hell, I went to the bathroom and looked in my new trunks. The designer had left a sewing needle in the crotch netting. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I went swimming. While I was walking along side of the pool, everyone was staring at me. I began to think that my diet was really working. It was only an hour later, in the changing rooms, that I noticed the string from my Tampax that was sticking out of my swimming costume. FML
Today, I went swimming at a public pool. When I dove in, my speedos decided they’d had enough of me and slipped right off. I spent a minute underwater debating my life choices before realizing they’d floated to the shallow end, right next to a group of giggling kids. FML
Today, I was riding my bike without the seat cover on. I hit a curb wrong and the two metal rods from the skeleton of the seat went through my jeans. I went to the med clinic to then find out that I had to get stitches in my scrotum. There were no male doctors. FML
Today, at work, I wet my pants. I had to throw my tighty-whities away. Since I didn't have underwear on, I chafed real bad and got a rash on my butthole and near my balls. I had to push my boyfriend off of me, all because it hurt too much to touch. FML
Today, I rubbed my heel raw with a new shoe, so I put a bandaid on and went to the pool. A few minutes later, I noticed the bandaid floating close to me. I'm not an ass so I quickly fished it out and put in the pocket of my swimming trunks. Later, I went to shower and noticed that my bandaid was still on my heel. FML
Today, I was lifting weights at the gym and felt proud of myself for pushing through a tough set. Then, I looked down and noticed my shorts had ripped right along the seam. Based on their disgusted faces, everyone behind me got an unwelcome show. FML
Today, at the pool, I tried to impress the hot lifeguard by doing the perfect dive. Afterward, I realized my shorts were floating through the water. FML
Today, I was swimming my routine laps at the gym's pool and a man came in and swam in the adjacent lane. While swimming freestyle, I smelled a really nasty fart. Not a minute later, he hurriedly left. I didn't realize what he had done until I saw "floating particles" in the water. FML
Today, I was in a rush to get to the toilet, I went in and sat on the seat. Then I felt a stinging pain on my left bum cheek. I jumped up quickly to see a wasp splashing around in the bowl. It stung me, and now have a bum cheek twice its normal size, and pee all over my pants. FML
Today, I got a lovely little surprise after I got out of the shower. That lovely little surprise? I got stung in the scrotum by a hornet that had decided to nestle itself inside the towel I was drying off with. FML
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Top comments
camer0n15 8
Sue them
DocBastard 40
It took you an entire hour to check out why your balls were getting stabbed? Sorry, but if I ever feel like I'm getting a scrotum piercing, I'm going to immediately find out why. I'm not sure who is more stupid - you or the person who left the needle there.
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Comments (163)
a1f0sff 25
That's extremely not responsible of their part...
perdix 31
Why didn't you investigate the problem sooner? Perhaps that sensation isn't so foreign to you because you've got a needle dick.
ChaosAngel17 14
Maybe he likes pain? Fetishes come in all types.
BeaterOfTheDrums 15
How could anyone like needles to the nuts?
ladyLALAA 29
Boo, so did not see your post!
Phluid 5
Maybe he couldn't check in public? o:.
ladyLALAA 29
So you have a pin dick? Haha, kidding. FYL!
EduJav321 24
No babies fo you
a1f0sff 25
Hahaha I could imagine the sperm coming out of his balls instead of his dick... Never gets to get inside of the ****** ----> no baby
pepelapew 0
Moron
a1f0sff 25
Hahaha I was only kidding...
ninjuh_wingman 29
It probably couldve been a lot worse.
wironandine 8
I wish I had swimming in PE when I was in school.
vintagemeow 6
You should probably make sure your scrotum doesn't leak now.. But don't worry, duct tape will fix that baby right up
TheGothGamerGirl 20
YDI for not checking your pants sooner.
andrew8663 0
THAT SUCKS!!!
rhysfucker 24
Several posts picked up on the custom Halston swim shorts, and Perdix scooped me on the 'needle dick' so I'm going to go with: "I guess getting poked in the scrotum is better than getting plugged in the asshole." Bring it!!!