Today, I learned that my parents lied. They didn't meet each other at an acid house rave. They met each other at a crack house. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I found out how my parents met. They met at a mental hospital, where they were both being hospitalized. FML
Today, my house was raided for drugs. I had to find out my father is a drug dealer. The cops then told me this wasn't their first time here, but it was the first time I was home to see it. They said it was nice to finally meet me. FML
Today, my dad told me that I was conceived while he and my mother were high on LSD. He then stared into the distance, mumbled "Probably explains a few things" and chuckled to himself. FML
Today, I found out my parents only had me in an attempt to fix their relationship. It didn't work. FML
Today, I found out that my parents are first cousins. FML
Today, I found out that the only reason my parents have been letting me hang out with my friends so late is so they can search my room for drugs. FML
Today, I found out that my parents think my boyfriend is the devil. FML
Today, my mom and step-dad tore my room apart looking for the stash of drugs they thought I had. I've never touched drugs in my life, and I guess they believe me now. Didn't stop them from making me clean up the mess they made, though. FML
Today, I hid my parents' booze since I'd always thought their shitty behavior was due to drinking too much. Turns out they're just assholes. FML
Today, my parents told me about how they met. I'd already known they were eight years apart, but I never knew my dad started dating my mom when he was 21 and she was 13. FML
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Top comments
evistman 12
If you just found out then it seems they are pretty far in their road to recovery
manb91gb 15
It's not about where you started out, it's about the journey. Remember that.
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Comments (14)
slowhandjp 18
What’s wrong with that?
manb91gb 15
It's not about where you started out, it's about the journey. Remember that.
evistman 12
If you just found out then it seems they are pretty far in their road to recovery
BurnInDemonFire 39
Are you one of the Gallagher Brothers?
Mooglefox 24
I find that they found each other at either place very bad.
PirateSnozzle 8
Presumably they're clean now and perhaps didn't want to share that particular story with a child. If you found out from them then as upsetting as it may be they obviously feel you're mature enough to handle the truth now. If someone else told you then that's unfortunate and perhaps worth a conversation with both the person that told and your parents. Your parents need to know that someone spoke out of turn. Also, just because they met there doesn't mean you were conceived/born there. Or, perhaps finding out they were pregnant with you was the push they needed to sort themselves out which could only be seen as a good thing, right?
Ksweety_fml 27
damn........
bullsonyourface 20
better than one of those damn pot houses, thank your lucky stars you weren't tainted by the devil's lettuce
Surewhatever 36
Well, since this seems to be a shock to you, they must be doing much better. I'm probably going to tell my kid he was conceived on acid maybe when he's in his 20s. But the key point would be that I immediately straightened up when I found out I was pregnant, I hope your parents also had a sudden, huge lifestyle change!