Maiar
Winnipeg, Canada
Today, my husband confessed that when he's angry with me, he uses my makeup sponge to apply his hemorrhoid cream. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Lenore
Setup
Today, I was diagnosed with hemorrhoids. My husband said we should “adapt, not panic” and brought lubricant from the garage. It had a skull warning on it. Apparently I married an engineer. FML
nicole
Reserved
Today, my boyfriend confessed that after every fight we have, he dips my toothbrush in the toilet. FML
Toothy
United States
Today, I learned that when I leave skid marks in the toilet my wife uses my toothbrush to remove them. FML
Anonymous
United Kingdom
Today, my boyfriend confessed to me that he purposely makes me angry, because when I'm angry, I clean, and it saves him having to do it himself. FML
smf_ds
Rebordosa, Portugal
Today, I witnessed my dad spreading his ass cheeks to show my mom the rashes his hemorrhoids are giving him. FML
Anonymous
Princeton, United States
Today, my husband caught me scratching my armpit with his beard brush. Just last week I swore that I never touch it. FML
Anonymous
This is us
Today, my husband asked me to check his asshole to see if his haemorrhoid had grown any bigger. This is my life now, all romance gone, and having to check his hairy ringpiece every day, and our kids wonder why I drink before I can fall asleep. FML
peachezthelette
Itchy butt
Today, while at work, I had to explain over the phone to my 33-year-old boyfriend how to use Preparation H. FML
disgusted
Harpenden, United Kingdom
The language of love
Today, my husband asked me to spoon him. He used it as an excuse to start farting on me. Yep, this is my husband. FML
Anonymous
Itchy and scratchy
Today, I finally forced my husband to go to the doctor's for his chronically itchy arsehole, which he scratches in his sleep, and ends up bleeding all over the sheets. Turns out it’s a fungal infection. Now he has to apply a cream twice a day, which isn’t fun to watch when he does it in the bedroom. FML
Top comments
lvg_fml 10
How old is this man? He needs to learn how to communicate appropriately
harrison99 4
Hope you too MAKE UP! All crappy puns aside I'm sorry about that :(
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Comments (103)
Alessia1269 14
groooooss!!! im very very sorry for u :/
adrian1910 15
Shouldn't have gotten him angry. YDI
khaoticpanda 28
Haha no. Thats awesome
Grenith 21
#1 new country hit!
Aew 17
That's not awesome. That's repulsive. She could get conjunctivitis or something worse.
MrsDruidess 23
well at least her eyes wont be puffy LMAO
Retaheki 27
That is incredibly gross, hope you two can help prevent problems, or maybe hide your sponge.
Crossing 17
Put itching powder on the sponge. That will teach him!
rachb007 11
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
That's hilarious. And eww.
lvg_fml 10
How old is this man? He needs to learn how to communicate appropriately
ohSNAPyall 27
He needs to chill his RRHOID RAGE
jojimugo 20
That's just low, come on man
ComoEsJuan 24
I guess one could say... The bottom?
ohSNAPyall 27
Definitely below the belt.
rhysfucker 24
Eases the swelling and covers up those unsightly anal blemishes.
AnAnorexicAsian 8
Is it me or are more hemorrhoid-related FMLs being published recently? Probably just me.
harrison99 4
Hope you too MAKE UP! All crappy puns aside I'm sorry about that :(
AshBash2211 14
Two*
iwanttogotoparis 26
That's slightly disgusting
chosha_fml 27
Slightly?
Mauskau 36
That's slightly appealing.
Moklon 18
I for one do not find the applying of cream onto a hemorrhoid using a makeup sponge appealing, but then again, I always seem to have the unpopular opinion
XxAtreyuSinsxX 14
That's pretty ****** up...
blorainbowody 5
Well that's totally normal