Today, I had the brilliant idea of jumping off a swing at its highest point. I can now add two things to my list of accomplishments: making out with a tree and breaking my nose. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I decided to impress my friends by doing a flip on the trampoline. What did impress them, was my lack of tears after I hit the edge of the trampoline and broke my nose. FML
Today, during a wild party, I climbed up to the second floor, over a railing, and leapt for the chandelier, screaming, "I'M GONNA SWING FROM THE CHANDELIER!" I swung for a second, everyone was cheering, and then the chandelier gave way. Now I'm in hospital with millions of stitches. FML
Today, at school, I offered my friend $5 to climb up a tree and jump off. I was already having a hard day and just wanted a bit of a laugh. What I didn't expect was to end up in the hospital with a broken arm because my friend jumped on me. FML
Today, I got too drunk at a party and cracked a tooth from opening a beer bottle with my teeth, farted something nasty in a room alone with someone, tried to climb a tree and fell out, and watched my crush make out with his new girl. FML
Today, I managed to fell a tree perfectly. It landed exactly where it should. Today is also the day I managed to Whack-a-Mole in real life. FML
Today, I went swinging with my friend at the park. Seeing a few cute guys playing basketball, I tried to act cute, laughing loudly and letting my hair fly all over the place. Just as they look over the swing broke. I fell on my face, my jeans sliding down, mooning them. They laughed hysterically. FML
Today, I was hanging out with a guy I like. We climbed a tree to watch the sunset, and as the sun went down, I kissed him. He fell out of the tree. FML
Today, my friends and I went to the park for some planking. Trying to find a daring spot, I climbed a tree and laid down on a branch. While I was waiting for my friends to take a picture, the branch gave out. FML
Today, I thought it would be fun to climb a tree. My older sister also thought it would be fun to set the tree on fire. FML
Today, I tried jumping off my bed over the footboard. I tripped and broke a full length mirror with my face. FML
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Top comments
Cocoapelli 23
I would say ydi, but who am I to kink shame.
jkjorn 18
And now I have the "George of the Jungle" theme stuck in my head.
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Comments (3)
Cocoapelli 23
I would say ydi, but who am I to kink shame.
RichardPencil 32
I hope it wasn't an ugly tree.
jkjorn 18
And now I have the "George of the Jungle" theme stuck in my head.