Today, a man asked me on a date. It's been so long, I accepted immediately. He began quoting what seemed like random numbers to me, and it took me a few minutes to work out what he meant. Not only was I mistaken for a prostitute, I'm also worth, at most, $60. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was walking down the street and while stopped at a light, this old man waved at me. Thinking nothing of it, I walked through a parking lot to get to where I was going, where he not only followed me, but mistook me for a prostitute. It was 5pm. FML
Today, I went on a date with a guy I've been flirting with at work. Some coworkers had discreetly warned me about him, but I thought he was cute. We get to the date, and after an hour of small talk, he spent the next two hours trying to get me to invest in his crypto coin thing that "is definitely going to be huge." FML
Today, I went on a date with a guy who seemed to be quite the gentleman. I was proven wrong when he told me to "shut it" during dinner, stiffed me on the bill, and then left me at the restaurant so he could get his own taxi home. FML
Today, I was in a dating auction. I was bought for $2. The man who won a date with me recited every dialog from the movie The Lord of the Rings. FML
Today, I was finally asked out on a date after a year of being single. Turns out he got the wrong number. FML
Today, a coworker invited me out for a date, totally out of the blue. I had no idea she liked me, but I did my best to impress. She ordered the most expensive steak on the menu, two bottles of wine, and eventually picked up and went home with our waiter. I got the bill. FML
Today, some girl hit me up and was flirting with me over text. It turns out she was doing it for money and it’s been so long that I almost fell for it. FML
Today, a first date with a guy went so badly that he actually paid me to never call him again. FML
Today, I was mistaken for a prostitute. Twice. While in my work uniform. FML
Today, I went on a date for the first time in eight months. He didn't make a move. I then asked if we were on a date. He said, "I don't know, I guess." I can't tell either. FML
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Top comments
coach321 7
At least you know your price if you ever get into that business...
iampoughkeepsie 11
I once heard girl/boyfriends cost 3 potato, so $60 is pretty good when you think about it...
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Comments (46)
worldclassrager 41
Never hurts to try out a dating site
eatinchocolate 8
you should've agreed. you were attracted to him and free $60!!
nurchok 15
Sorry to hear that OP. Did you at least slap and spit in his face?
ThomasBombadil 31
What? Slap and spit in his face? Those actions are called assault and can land you in jail. I think laughter here would do the trick.
MidnightMusic53 37
Don't ever agree on dates unless you know the person well enough. You put your life in danger when you agree to go out with a stranger. Find yourself a nice gentleman to go on a date with, or if you're really longing to go on a date, you could try online dating, just be safe! If you meet someone in person that you've been talking to online, please take someone strong with you, or even take a few people for your own safety. Make sure you meet in a very public place, too in broad daylight. Hope things get better for you, OP.
plunkit 6
So, what were you willing to do for $60?
RadKayRae 8
How on earth were you dressed? Since he assumed you were a hooker, you must have looked pretty easy. ha
AlexRen 21
So he thought you were a hollaback girl?
gbrodee1 5
$60 ain't bad
Sirmrcrowley 12
That's like $35 Canadian right!?!?
emopoe 12
I'm a complete moron, just passing through.