Today, after realizing it burned when I peed, I found out the boy I waited two years to have sex with gave me gonorrhea. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I found out the girl I gave my virginity to gave me gonorrhea. FML
Today, I learned that the burning sensation I get on my balls isn't from when my girlfriend poured hot sauce on my balls as a prank, it's actually gonorrhea. FML
Today, I found out that not only did I get the best blowjob of my life on New Year's Eve, I also got gonorrhea. FML
Today, I confessed my feelings to the guy I've been seeing. He confessed that he gave me chlamydia. FML
Today, my new boyfriend with whom I'm completely smitten called me and told me he had an early Valentine's Day gift for me. Gonorrhea. FML
Today, I gave my virginity to my boyfriend. All I got in return was rug burn and an infection. FML
Today, I found out that my boyfriend cheated on me by testing myself for STIs/STDs and got a positive result for chlamydia. FML
Today, I went to the doctor's thinking I had a UTI. Turns out I have an STD. FML
Today, I found out I have a huge infected boil on my vagina. The worst part was that I wasn't the one to discover this. My boyfriend was. FML
Today, after I got wasted about 5 months ago and lost my virginity to a total bitch I used to work with and regretted it straight away, this morning she texts me that she’s pregnant, and that I should probably get an STD screening because she also just found out she has gonorrhoea. FML
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Top comments
CircusofValues 0
That definitely is full of suck. At least gonorrhea is curable.
snafu57 1
it's beginning to look a lot like syphillis
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Comments (110)
Tahsis 4
Okay, two things. 1. You are all stupid for not noticing this. 2. You can only get gonorrhea with vaginal intercourse or semen. So unless you both jacked off into a cup, then rubbed your penises in each other's semen, you did not get gonorrhea. So, either this is fake, or maybe you just clicked the wrong circle.
lahp 0
pendatic is right :P P00NED
exotramp 5
Maybe the guy gave him a *******? seriously my friend contracted gonnorhea down his throat (he initially thought it was a very bad sore throat) after giving a guy a *******.- guy later admitted to my friend that he knew he had the clap.
elliethenub 0
serves you right for not having protected sex, idiot.
cheesy56 0
If you haven't yet noticed, these were 2 men having sex. Soo where did cervical cancer come from exactly??
MissSparkie 0
love it when someone is ill informed and calls someone else and idiot. despite the fact that this appears to be two men, i have to say there are many many strains of HPV, not just wart or cancer causing ones and the inoculation doesn't cover all strands just the more common ones.
PsychoGorgeous 0
Number 7....There are almost 300 or so different types of HPV. Some cases lead to warts, some lead to warts and the possible cervical cancer. Others lead to just possible cervical cancer without the warts. However, men can get HPV but there are no tests for men. If a man gets HPV with no warts, he will probably never know he has it, but is still able to pass it on to other women. Or men, i guess. Sometimes you don't even have to have sex to get HPV. Anyways, i find it weird that he waited 2 years and STILL didnt tell you when you guys first had sex. Good thing it can be cured. Safe sex. Or abstinance. We all know this, now.
perdix 31
Gonorrhea is easily curable with simple antibiotics. For Christmas, maybe you two dudes can snuggle up next to a fire and share a bottle of penis-cillin. Did I say that?
CarterColbie 4
#32 You made my ******' day! Lmfao!
sleephunters 8
#32 FTW
cstetchman 0
LMFAO hahahah Perdix ftw !!
yeahreally 6
the gift that keeps on giving lmfao..
Tahsis 4
So... you sleep with a guy who recently slept with another guy and didn't bother to cure it, and then bitch about something that can be cured in a few days?
omghehehe 0
Ummm, I hope you got tested for other STDs. Gonorrhea is the least of your worries, especially with anal sex, but I'm sure you know that, right?
perdix 31
On the First Day of Christmas, my true love gave to me: gonorrhea. On the Second Day of Christmas, my true love gave to me: anal warts. Third Day: Rectal Bleeding Fourth Day: A nice felch. Fifth Day: H - I - V! I leave days 6 -12 as a exercise for the reader;)
omghehehe 0
Hahaha... Perdix, Very creative! I actually was singing along while I was reading it :D Yes, you said that, "penis-cillin." LOL!!
kgfheels 0
don't have sex just kidding