Today, on my first full day on Marine Corps boot camp, my drill instructor pulled me and another kid in front of 200 other recruits to vote on who was uglier between the two of us. I won. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, at the elementary school where I teach, the kids all voted for their favorite teacher. I was the only one to receive zero votes. When I asked a small group of students why no one voted for me, one boy replied "because you're the ugliest". FML
Today, I went to a veterans' reunion party with my grandpa. While there, a guy started yelling at me for having an unapproved haircut. It was my grandpa's old drill sergeant, and he thought I was in the army too. Everyone just smirked as he forced me to drop and do push-ups. FML
Today, it was my first day at Military School. Our commander walked into the sleeping quarters, instructing us all to get up and stand at the foot of our beds. I had morning wood, which the commander wasted no time in addressing in front of the rest of the room. FML
Today at camp, we were choosing teams for capture the flag. It's embarrassing to be chosen last, but today I learnt it's even more embarrassing to not be chosen at all. FML
Today, it was wacky tacky day at my school. I did not participate, however, I did get voted the tackiest outfit in my school. FML
Today, aside from clearing out my bank accounts and having an affair, the kicker was finding out my fiancé planned on taking himself and his mistress to Cancun for his birthday, while I would be attending the Marine Corps boot camp. FML
Today, I woke up and I'm still in the Marine Corps. FML
Today, army recruiters came to my school and set up some punching bags to attract potential recruits. I gave it a shot, managing to set the highest score at my school and fracture my wrist at the same time. FML
Today, it was the elections for Student Council President. I decided to be nice and vote for the only other competitor because it was her birthday. I lost by one vote. FML
Today, my drill sergeant found out it's my birthday. I spent the rest of the day scrubbing large, filthy pots for the entire base of 2000+ and scrubbing grime off of bathroom walls. Happy birthday to me! FML
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Top comments
Brenden Alistair Maye 4
you have your phone in boot? quit your bitching
crackpot8007t 7
Thankfully, it doesn't matter in the Marines at least
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Comments (14)
Jesse Duff 15
didn't know they gave access to the outside world during boot...
intorvertedmoose 9
You dont have access to cell phones normally. Some branches will let you have them instead of using pay phones to make a phone call once or twice for usually 30 minutes during boot but then they are usually taken right back. And I dont think youd still have them on your first day, but I'm not a marine so I cant really say for sure
core01 30
Recruits do not have any access to phones during bootcamp. Army gets that. Marines have 16 weeks of hard core beat downs 18 to 24 hours a day. You'd sell your mom for 30 minutes of free time w/out a DI on your back.
crackpot8007t 7
Thankfully, it doesn't matter in the Marines at least
Brenden Alistair Maye 4
you have your phone in boot? quit your bitching
cpguru24 18
Not marine boot camp. You are not allowed to take anything.
Amanda Beltran 2
Welcome to boot camp!! Good Luck and Thank you!!!!
mike3775 39
Man, when I went to boot camp in 1993, we got a 2 minute phone call home on first day and after that, we only got to call home every Sunday only, if we were lucky enough to not lose the privilege because some one in the company screwed up. As far as OP, it’s boot camp. That’s pretty tame compared to insults people (including myself) got when I went
Plop 17
To the geniuses here who seem unable to figure out the magic trick: the "today" in the post doesn't have to be literal. Chances are, OP went to booty camp years ago and just posted the anecdote today, which explains the access to a cellphone/PC.
mayaklast 12
About what one would expect from the delightful world of the marines. Quit if you haven't already... And yeah, most FML aren't actually from 'today' people, it doesn't mean the guy has his phone during his boot camp. Also... the 'I had it even worse so don't complain' thing doesn't make it OK. The fact that you had to deal with assholes don't make new assholes any less awful or don't authorize you to be assholes as well.
mike3775 39
It’s designed to build character. They break you down, and build you back up. You are supposed to hate it so much, you want to avoid it happening again. If one person messes up, the entire company gets punished (like Full Metal Jacket). That is done to build teamwork, and also train you to help the ones who are having a hard time. As far as “soft” boot camp, my boot camp time in 1993 was indeed “soft” compared to someone who had gone through just a decade prior. My drill instructor/company commander couldn’t slap me like what was shown in Full Metal Jacket, so yes, my time was softer than previous people, but it’s even softer now from what I have read. Hell my crossing the line ceremony (going from Polywog to Shellback when crossing the equator)was very very tame compared to what others had gone through just a couple years prior (thanks to the outcry over a hazing incident that made national news), and my second time crossing two years later was even tamer than the first, again thanks to another hazing scandal that went national.
cpguru24 18
1) all recruits look the same in boot camp. Your all ugly with your shaved heads lol 2) you did not have your cell phone in boot. Maybe when you got to MCT, but not before. 3) Take the good and leave the bad. Your better for the training you received. 4) Are you a marine? Most marines would not bitch about boot on FML. Thank you for serving. Even if you didn't make it through (its not for everyone) good job on pushing your boundaries. One of the best things you can do in life is learn and try what you like and learn what you don't like. It is the trying that matters most.
JasonThorn 23
Even in the USAF, they pull this sort of mind-trip on you. My MTI (military training instructor) greeted us as we got off the bus with, "I sure HOPE you don't like me, because I sure as F**K don't like YOU!"
Tammy Gabb 5
It gets worse lol they have to break you down to build you up