Today, on my first full day on Marine Corps boot camp, my drill instructor pulled me and another kid in front of 200 other recruits to vote on who was uglier between the two of us. I won. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, at the elementary school where I teach, the kids all voted for their favorite teacher. I was the only one to receive zero votes. When I asked a small group of students why no one voted for me, one boy replied "because you're the ugliest". FML
Today, I went to a veterans' reunion party with my grandpa. While there, a guy started yelling at me for having an unapproved haircut. It was my grandpa's old drill sergeant, and he thought I was in the army too. Everyone just smirked as he forced me to drop and do push-ups. FML
Today, it was my first day at Military School. Our commander walked into the sleeping quarters, instructing us all to get up and stand at the foot of our beds. I had morning wood, which the commander wasted no time in addressing in front of the rest of the room. FML
Today at camp, we were choosing teams for capture the flag. It's embarrassing to be chosen last, but today I learnt it's even more embarrassing to not be chosen at all. FML
Today, it was wacky tacky day at my school. I did not participate, however, I did get voted the tackiest outfit in my school. FML
Today, aside from clearing out my bank accounts and having an affair, the kicker was finding out my fiancé planned on taking himself and his mistress to Cancun for his birthday, while I would be attending the Marine Corps boot camp. FML
Today, I woke up and I'm still in the Marine Corps. FML
Today, army recruiters came to my school and set up some punching bags to attract potential recruits. I gave it a shot, managing to set the highest score at my school and fracture my wrist at the same time. FML
Today, it was the elections for Student Council President. I decided to be nice and vote for the only other competitor because it was her birthday. I lost by one vote. FML
Today, my drill sergeant found out it's my birthday. I spent the rest of the day scrubbing large, filthy pots for the entire base of 2000+ and scrubbing grime off of bathroom walls. Happy birthday to me! FML
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Top comments
Brenden Alistair Maye 4
you have your phone in boot? quit your bitching
crackpot8007t 7
Thankfully, it doesn't matter in the Marines at least
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Comments (14)
Reggie89 2
by the end of marine boot camp y'all both will be ugly and dark green. Most importantly don't let him catch you with that phone.
turkishwife 10
Woow since when were phones allowed in boot camp. I was lucky to get a one minute phone call on a pay phone after one month there
cpguru24 18
They are not allowed in Marine boot camp. If caught, there are severe penalties. One phone call when they arrive and they read a script and hang up. Then letters from there on out until close to graduation. Other branches (like USAF) you are allowed to bring luggage and phone to boot. Marines, you cannot bring anything except the clothes on your back. Not even change in your pocket. They are told to give any travel cash (for the trip/flight to boot) give away and come with nothing.