Today, my mother asked me if I'd heard of anal sex. Before I could fully process her question, she explained that it's dangerous because the tissues of the anus are finer and more susceptible to STDs. There were still forty minutes left in our car ride. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, my mother warned me that if I ever have anal sex I will die. I'm 28. FML
Today, a few weeks after coming out to my parents, my mother randomly asked me, "Your father and I have tried anal sex a few times, but it hurts too much. D'you have any advice on what to do?" FML
Today, my mom gave me a talk on safe sex. During a three hour car ride. With my friends in the back seat. FML
Today, I was waiting downstairs at my boyfriend's house as he got ready to go. His mom came over and said she was so glad her son had met me, that I made him really happy. I smiled thinking how nice that was of her to say. She then continued, "Still, he tells me anal is a no?" FML
Today, while discussing having sex for the first time with my boyfriend, I asked what method of birth control we should use. He replied, "Anal." FML
Today, while discussing having sex for the first time with my boyfriend, I asked what method of birth control we should use. He replied, "Anal." FML
Today, I was driving with my mother. The ride was 2 hours long. For the first hour, she talked about how uncomfortable sex is the first time. For the second, she talked about how I should take accordion lessons. FML
Today, I went out of town with my mother-in-law. I don't know what possessed her to start questioning me about her son's and my sex life. When I told her I wasn't talking about that, she began to discuss her and my father-in-law's bedroom habits. The car ride was two hours. FML
Today, while sitting at a red light, my mother asked, "Do you have any intimacy questions?" FML
Today, my girlfriend was rushed to the hospital with anal tearing. We've never tried anal before, but it turns out she and my "best friend" sure have. FML
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Top comments
perdix 31
Tell her you need "a nap" and to turn off auto-correct on your iPhone.
perdix 31
You should ask her how Dad gives it to her. That will make the last 39 minutes of your ride silent . . . or more disturbing than the Blue Waffle.
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Comments (141)
Zorcnpals 0
anal is gross
chapachristina4 0
that's very disturbing O.o
adrifter 0
Wow your mom Sucks.
anjewsauras 0
honestly this would be a normal conversation between my mother and me
fuckyourcouch89 0
you deserved it for being a *****.
eshhayz 0
ask her if she's ever heard of vag shot , then proceed to punch her in the groin .
mrbutterz 0
well op that suck but just tell her she's wrong because she is... higher possibility for infection but not to an STD, regular sex is just as likely to get an STD...
sosoinlove09 0
at least she's talking to you about it and giving you information that is needed. now you know she cares enough for you to let you know the easiest way to catch aids/ HIV
crazedguy 0
looks like your mother *puts in glasses* is planning another ride YEYEEAAAHHHHH
fishboy123 7
atleast it wasn't ur dad asking