Today, I was giving my boyfriend a long blowjob and had to pause for a minute because my mouth became exceedingly dry. His solution? Spit directly in my mouth. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my boyfriend and I were messing around in his car. I then decided I was going to give him a blowjob for the first time. As I was going down, he grabbed my chin and said, "Don't do that, your mouth isn't clean enough." FML
Today, I was about to make out with my boyfriend, so I quickly swallowed my gum. Moments later, I started choking on the gum, and ended up spitting it out into his face. FML
Today, I was giving my boyfriend a blow job. I thought it was going great and I was doing a good job, until he told me to "stop chomping on it like it's a hot dog." FML
Today, having regularly given my husband blowjobs, I suggested, mid-session, that he could maybe reciprocate. He complained that I was wet, begrudgingly licked for about a minute and then gave up. FML
Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend and he ejaculated without warning, shooting straight up my nostril. I accidentally snorted it, started choking, and then coughed it up in my mouth. FML
Today, my boyfriend wanted a blowjob, shortly after we've started dating. He said to be careful because he blows a massive load. Thinking he's full of crap, I rolled my eyes and got to work. Had him going and then a massive load shot down my throat and a bunch of fire hoses sprayed out my nose. It burned so bad. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were cuddling on the couch. He held a Kool Fruit in his teeth, and motioned for me to kiss him, so he could put it in my mouth. Just as he was about to do this, I inhaled. He then had to watch me dry retching, trying to get it back up. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were cuddling on the couch. Trying to be suave, he put a Kool-Fruit between his teeth and motioned for me to kiss him so he could put it in my mouth. Just as he was about to do so, I inhaled, swallowing it. He then had to watch me dry-retching as I tried to get it back up. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were getting intimate. As I started getting close to having my first ever orgasm, I got extremely short of breath and started hyperventilating. His reaction was to cover my mouth to shut me up. FML
Today, while in the middle of giving my husband a blow job, I looked up to see him staring into space and vigorously picking his nose. FML
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Top comments
TelevisionMan 18
Somebody's been watching too much ****.
almost_there44 26
You literally had his dick in your mouth a few seconds before that...😒
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Comments (30)
TelevisionMan 18
Somebody's been watching too much ****.
almost_there44 26
You literally had his dick in your mouth a few seconds before that...😒
ThatGuy9679 13
She was ready and expecting a dick in her mouth she wasn't expecting him to spit in her mouth
mssileas 25
By that logic I'd have to enjoy drinking his piss too.
almost_there44 26
If that's what you like, I'm no one to judge.
tounces7 28
Piss is a bit different than Saliva I'd say....especially since people swap Saliva all the time...
Dodge4x4Ram 46
she's a keeper
Esti 8
It worked though, didn't it?
PenguinPal3017 19
Tell him not to expectorate another ******* any time soon.
RichardPencil 32
You're grossed out by him injecting his saliva in your mouth? Do you want to know what's cumming soon?
SneezyBear 27
To be fair, it's still the kind of thing you'd appreciate some warning at the very least.
SneezyBear 27
To be fair, it's still the kind of thing you'd appreciate some warning at the very least.
RichardPencil 32
Would it be ok to refer to such a warning as a “heads-up?”
LeoCor 19
Well it’s about consent... she allowed a dick in her mouth but spitting, something that can be a major turn off, she didn’t expect or want
LeoCor 19
Well it’s about consent... she allowed a dick in her mouth but spitting, something that can be a major turn off, she didn’t expect or want
Togapika 4
Nothing is cumming soon, and that's part of the problem...
tr3yr 13
I love when that happens! 🙌🤐
Mungolikecandy 19
If things went well then spit in your mouth was the last thing to worry about!
real life problems 26
I would spit on you too if you were giving me a dry job
Barbara Woodke 8
You had to willingly hold your mouth open and let him spit in your mouth, so this is literally all your fault.