Today, my intoxicated husband asked my very conservative parents how their sex life is now that all the kids are out of the house. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my drunk dad went off on a tangent about his porn watching habits to the whole family. FML
Today, my husband’s been dropping hints he wants to open our marriage. When I got home, a couple of his coworkers dropped by "for drinks". They tried to initiate group sex and figured I just needed to be talked into it. I was so mad, I couldn’t throw everyone out fast enough, including him. FML
Today, while at family dinner, my boyfriend got drunk and told my entire family the things I do in bed. FML
Today, I left the house to get groceries. My parents asked me where I was going and how long I would be gone for. Thinking they were just being inquisitive parents, I ignored them. I got home 20 minutes later to them having sex. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex while his parents were out. They came home early, ran upstairs, and knocked on the door. Scrambling to find our clothes, we gave up and just hid under the blankets. They barged in, drunk and laughing, and tried ripping the covers off. FML
Today, my husband and I came clean to his overbearing parents about our private wedding. It started with them accusing him of making rash decisions, and somehow descended into an argument amongst themselves that ended with his mom deciding to divorce his dad. FML
Today, I walked in on my husband's elderly parents getting it on. It’s beautiful they still love each other, I just wish they hadn’t decided to express that love on our living room sofa. FML
Today, my boyfriend came over to have dinner with my parents. They got quite drunk, and my mom shouted at him, "Have you had sex with my daughter?" As he was shaking his head, my dad said, "I have" in a really creepy voice, thinking it would be funny. It wasn't. FML
Today, my fiancé got drunk at our wedding reception and announced to his and my family what we do in bed. And it was pretty detailed. FML
Today, I found out that my father, who very recently lost his wife, decided that drunkenly hitting on my long-time boyfriend's mom was a good idea. FML
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Top comments
afrothunder666 5
So... How is it?
daringtoride 27
Oh, husbands. Making conversations awkward with the parental folks since before time.
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Comments (68)
afrothunder666 5
So... How is it?
Zachthejoker 10
Well with Viagra doing all the hard work...xD
hotshot2626 9
...and the rest of the hard work a mixture of tequila and a sex swing.
Zachthejoker 10
I believe it's just dandy. xD
LarryLaDouche 13
No hips were broken in the making of that home film. But the bed was.
Zachthejoker 10
Hahaha!
daringtoride 27
Oh, husbands. Making conversations awkward with the parental folks since before time.
iXTMAstro 6
Well at least your husband said it with words and not hand gestures. XD
Doortje 30
Swinging in the chandelier, I bet.
torbey 23
Your dp has caused me to crave a deliciously iced cupcake.
LiyIa_fml 8
This is true, that cupcake is beautiful.
smlrockslol 4
I FOUND YOU AGAIN
Welshite 40
^stalker
gc327072 31
alexhaz64 4
I'd imagine this would be even more of an FML if they'd actually answered!
LiyIa_fml 8
We don't know if they didn't! :O
LaBooskie 1
Tell your parents to losen up alittle.
drewcat21 0
Loosen*
ClazzyMonkey 10
Who knows, her mother just might be quite loose...
st333ph 12
It's be really awkward if they answered..
Pretty_Pink_Lady 10
"Oh it's amazing. Never been better. Bob just installed the swing. Wanna come take a looksie?"
annie_nk 23
"It's in your old room even!"
westcoastkp 13
Why would your husband be getting drunk around conservative people? I couldn't imagine them being drunk with you.
torbey 23
They may have not been drunk, but I'm sure conservative people still enjoy a drink or two.
SApprentice 34
7- Conservative people get drunk, too. They just drink wine, and fine liquors, and pretend that they're not drunk when they are so that they can get through their boring day to day lives.
desireev 18
Stereotypical much? ^^^
LiterOfCola 16
26 Not every conservative is a snobby rich person just like not every liberal is a lazy freeloader. I can see you being one, though.
SApprentice 34
36 and 57- You guys really can't handle a joke. There's no need to be so angry, or to insult me like that. I do try to have a little humor, and my jokes may not be good, but I try. I have nothing against conservatives, just like I have nothing against liberals. I think 99.99% of the human population are terrible creatures anyway, so it would be a waste of energy for me to hate any one group more than another. I'm sorry I managed to piss ya'll off.
ninjuh_wingman 29
Theres no way that that conversation will be awkward...
desireev 18
Hey now, this is a question that we all need to know about!
MrBond007_fml 6
The conservative ones always have the kinkiest private lives. That's a valid question.
lininnes 6
Totally agreed...