Today, I put on some skimpy shorts and bent down to get something on the bottom shelf of the fridge to get my boyfriend's attention. On my way up, I slammed my head on the edge of the fridge. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, I was leaning under a counter to get my girlfriend her favorite snack food out of a low cabinet when she decided it would be funny to poke me while I was in an awkward position. I jerked up, rammed my head on the bottom of the counter, and ended up at the ER with staples in my head. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were playing around. He threw me over his shoulder and turned around, smacking my face against the wall. Then he smacked my head into the fridge after turning round to see "what that loud bang" was. FML
Today, I had to squat to retrieve something from the bottom of the cabinet in the bathroom. This caused me to fart and startle myself enough that I jumped and banged my forehead on the sink. FML
Today, my boyfriend thought it would be cute to try and pick me up while kissing, instead he tripped and slammed the back of my head on the corner of the wall. FML
Today, I was trying to convince my boyfriend that I am NOT a dumb blonde. After screaming at the top of my lungs, I tripped over a bin and hit my head on a wall. FML
Today, I ran up to my boyfriend to kiss him when he got home from work. I tripped and I fell on him, and he fell backwards. He ended up hitting his head on the sidewalk and had to get stitches. He also had a concussion. FML
Today, while at work, I walked head first into the edge of a clothing rack. I was looking right at it. People saw. FML
Today, my alarm went off. I reached to swat it, missed, slipped, smacked my face on my dresser, and fell on the floor. As I picked myself up off the floor, I hit my head on the open top drawer of my other dresser. In 30 seconds of consciousness, I was attacked by two pieces of furniture. FML
Today, I somehow managed to hit my head on a first aid kit. I now have a cut on my forehead and my boyfriend just keeps laughing from the irony. FML
Today, at work, I managed to hit myself in the face with a large sheet pan. The force made me back into a shelf, which knocked a box off the top, which hit me in the head and knocked me out-cold. I now have a fat lip, a sore head, and bruises all over from the fall. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
wes85 2
probably got his attention.
MyNameIsInvictus 0
NOTE. That never works. Fail.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (124)
SparkleMotion44 0
that's arousing
Ragnir 0
OP I hate to say it but the newly formed bump on your head will probably steal the thunder from your booty shorts, you should totally go along with it and role play as a unicorn, at least you would probably be a more interesting person then.
TheIrishJaneDoe 9
Not if her thighs are big enough. Then nothin' can steal their thunder!
heyitsbrii 0
Hot.(:
ArtIsResistance7 1
Were you bending over to get that man a beer? If so, I duly applaud your tactics. If not, then YDI.
mrmaks18 7
should hav knocked urself out I think that might work or jump out of the window if that doest I don't know what will and dont forget to buy him some glasses to help him notice things better
perdix 31
What was on the bottom shelf that would get his attention? Often, the vegetable crisper is on the bottom shelf. Is your boyfriend an ambiguously gay vegan and you were going to tempt him with a big cucumber?
suppressed08 2
isn't meat meant to go on the bottom? stops blood and stuff dripping on the veggies.
perdix 31
That really applies mainly to the dismembered parts of our victims, but we don't really talk about that...kinda like Fight Club.
omega802 0
well at least ur trying
joshdudeha 0
******** YDI
Aeropostale 0
Well, look at i this way: You probably got his attention when you hit your head :). Oh yeah, and if you need to dress slutty for your boyfriend to notice you, you need a new man...
hysterical 1
you definitely deserved it.. trying to come across as coy and sexy by wearing teeny shorts and pointedly bending down really does not work.