Today, I made my friends and family laugh by trying to put on costume glasses with a giant super-sized nose attached to them. They laughed hysterically. Not because of the gigantic nose, but because my real nose was radically bigger and the fake one wouldn't fit over it. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I wore a pair of glasses with no lenses because I thought I'd look smarter. I ended up poking myself in the eye several times, leaving it swollen. So much for making me look smarter. FML
Today, I spent my day creating a new type of laugh, and performing it in my head. FML
Today, I started my first day working at a toddler day care center. At one point I decided to play "got your nose" with one of the kids. It turns out this kid has a physical birth abnormality on his face. I got his nose... his prosthetic nose. FML
Today, I went to a Halloween party dressed as a pirate. Someone complimented me on how convincing the fake teeth were that I had on for my costume. I wasn't wearing fake teeth. FML
Today, at work as an optician, I gave a little girl a new pair of glasses and asked her if she could see better with them. She replied, "Oh, yeah, you've got two big zits on your nose!" FML
Today, I was wondering why I was getting strange looks all day at work. When I got to a mirror after my shift, I noticed a booger hanging out of my nose, which was visible only when I smiled. My job involves greeting people all day with a huge smile. FML
Today, I was babysitting for a new family. The youngest said, "Wow! You have huge nostrils!" She noticed my offended look and pushed her nose up like a pig's, saying, "It’s okay! Now I do too!" FML
Today, I got a perm in an attempt to prove to my family that I'd been doing well with my life since I last saw them almost a year ago. I ended up going over for dinner looking like Bozo the Clown thanks to my idiot stylist, and my brothers wouldn't stop mocking me about it. FML
Today, I was talking to my crush when I laughed so hard that I snorted. Then I tried to play it cool by saying, "I do that on purpose sometimes." Now he probably thinks I fake-snort for fun. FML
Today, I decided to impress my friends by doing a flip on the trampoline. What did impress them, was my lack of tears after I hit the edge of the trampoline and broke my nose. FML
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Top comments
perdix 31
I know how you feel! It's the same thing that happens to me when I try to use a garbage bag as a condom;)
SkoomaKi 28
I can just tell you're a nosey person! :D Shoot me now, it's for the best.
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Comments (126)
numbersystem 4
:) you made your family laugh! Its a win!
santel_fml 8
Get a nose job you poor thing
groupleader 7
You need bigger glasses...
heelsanonymous 1
That's really funny Jew know
crazyskillz122 0
Wow u mad
husky22 0
nose job in your near future?
Glidefedt 6
Ah, De Gaulle, we meet again..
buddy565 7
Well you know what a big nose means ;)
Senseless_487 29
Yeah, means he can't wear novelty glasses.
theonlysweetpea 10
It's ok. I have a large nose as well.
Eiregal2 10
You could be like a new best love attraction for an Eskimo lol