Today, I started my first day working at a toddler day care center. At one point I decided to play "got your nose" with one of the kids. It turns out this kid has a physical birth abnormality on his face. I got his nose... his prosthetic nose. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, it was the first day of my job at a kindergarten. A boy fell over in the playground, so I ran over to see if he was OK. He got up and had a huge red mark on the side of his face. Shocked, I yelled "Oh my god, your face!" Turns out it's a very large port-wine birthmark and now he won't stop crying. FML
Today, I was wondering why I was getting strange looks all day at work. When I got to a mirror after my shift, I noticed a booger hanging out of my nose, which was visible only when I smiled. My job involves greeting people all day with a huge smile. FML
Today, I was babysitting for a new family. The youngest said, "Wow! You have huge nostrils!" She noticed my offended look and pushed her nose up like a pig's, saying, "It’s okay! Now I do too!" FML
Today, one of the children at my daycare came up to me and bit me on the face. He laughed so hard at my scream, that he threw up in my lap. FML
Today, at work as an optician, I gave a little girl a new pair of glasses and asked her if she could see better with them. She replied, "Oh, yeah, you've got two big zits on your nose!" FML
Today, I was working at a daycare. There was a 6-year-old boy pretending to be my doctor, holding a little, plastic thermometer. He then, without warning, quickly shoved it deep into my ear. The last thing I heard was his giggle. I think I'm deaf. FML
Today, I was working at a day care center. A 5 year old boy came up to me telling me he wanted to eat my face. Confused, I asked him why. He said, "Because your face looks like pizza." FML
Today, and for the last year, I have a disfiguring scar on my nose that I’m very self conscious about. My 4 year-old niece recently noticed it. Now every time she sees me she leans in real close and says, “What’s wrong with your face?” FML
Today, my boyfriend accidentally broke my nose the day he was meeting my parents for the first time. FML
Today, at work at daycare, this kid was coughing really bad, so I put my hand in front of his mouth in case he was choking on something so he could spit it out. But nope he wasn't choking, he was sick. He puked right into my hands. FML
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Top comments
SwaggerMelon 6
Did you give it back?
Snapple95 10
Poor kid .
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Comments (227)
firelight619 0
Wow 0.o
Keyman1212 14
Oh shit... Wonder if Micheal Jackson's kids would play that game... In your defense however, you didn't know.
LiveLaughFML 10
the golden rule: keep your hands to yourself! this wouldn't have happened if you did, creeper. lol :(
LuHGiiiT 11
...But everyone nose about Johnny's birth abnormality..?
iTrevor 5
That stinks..
UMad_Bro 3
35 Haha I see what you did there.
AnwarK95 1
Did anyone realize the username of OP? hahaha good one
Friaza 29
-31 Not everybody is a rapist.
poostool 5
Kid deserved it for losing his nose.
Merylwen 24
That poor child is going to have a horrible life... Other kids will make fun of him at school, and I bet that won't even stop when he's an adult.
Light_Star 4
That was a bit...NOSY!
ducttapewallet 7
Ever read the book Thinner by Stephen King? That gypsy had no nose. Just sayin'.
emeraldchicky 0
HAHAHA! No.
Klums02 0
That is a one in a million chance right there...
Hearon20 0
Oh nose! That would suck.
JustOhSoLovely 6
0.o what are the chances of that happening...
JustOhSoLovely 6
0.o what are the chances of that happening...
upyourzlolz 11
Why is voldemort at a daycare?
SwaggerMelon 6
Did you give it back?
supertacowaffle 41
STAND BACK HE'S GOT A NOSE!
colby6666 43
Ah, asdf movie references
Snapple95 10
Poor kid .
WCARlover 35
Yeah, the kid must have been mortified!
sxe_beast 11
Dude, the OP must be mortified! Holy ****! I would literally shit myself if that happened! OMFG. Or faint... O.O
pinkbabypuff1 0
OP must feel so bad! Poor kid:(
liquidSELECT 0
Wow.......i dont have anything clever to say just....WOW o.O
FlurffyPupQueen 7
Oh the irony
ifailplzinsultme 0
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
That's when you're supposed to throw it and say "fetch"
LedZeppelin1109 0
Oh cut the sentimental bullshit people, this comment is funny and you know it.
deaper 16
Hell yeah it's funny as shit!
oneleggedbeauty 0
You sir are a dick
ifailplzinsultme 0
I know I'm horrible person.... and I could see "onelegged" in your username. I hit a touchy area?
ifailplzinsultme 0
Add an a between I'm and horrible. Oops
GwarKitty 5
5. Boom this comment is awesome.
fl0ffy 0
134-do u really have one leg??and I agree with u
reptileguy1296 0
People who thumbed this down, humor is sometimes cynical. That doesn't mean they meant the joke seriously.
BbqKirbyAnn 0
Rofl thats the funniest thing I've read all day. Pat yourself on the back for that snappy comment
SadinSherman 16
177-It goes to far though
ifailplzinsultme 0
Haha I know I went too far. Oh well if I offended you I'm sorry
ChineseCookie 0
This is funny shit give me dislikes not him
childproofpizza 19
I guess she doesn't have a leg to stand on
Melissa92_fml 13
The day care centre didn't warn you in advance? Then I guess it's a 'fyl' moment because you couldn't have known.
redtigerlily 5
Well it must be a pretty convincing prosthetic. Lucky kid.
aruam365 24
They can make really realistic prosthetics these days but, op there really is no way to recover from that...
XxHoPPoxX 8
whats lucky bout bein noseless besides being able to greet ladies with the swift removal of your nose
ThreeSheetsGone 12
It could be a really cool party trick when the kid gets older.
iTrevor 5
Michael Jackson's son?
tromboneboy 2
Thad horrible but hillarious I'm an awful person
JustTemporary 24
haha that's funny.
AnthonyN 5
lmfao
EffYourLifeBench 0
Lmaoo I KNEW somebody was gonna say that... I just didn't wAnna be the one to d do it....RIP MJ
RandomAndCrazy 11
What about voldermart..
bubblepaarty 5
isn't this why teachers working at daycare centers saying "keep your hands to yourselves" ? /: tsk, tsk, tsk; you kinda deserved it . poor kid .
ifailplzinsultme 0
How did he deserve it? He didn't know.
CryMoreFMLs 15
Because every stupid person expect people to know everything about everyone! That's why he thinks OP deserved it.
Pendragon525 0
This guy works with these children at a day care center. You'd better believe he needs to know about the special needs kids in his care, and he needs to know BEFORE he begins to work with them! It could be disasterous otherwise.
clue_me_in 20
Wow. I also have nothing clever to say.
DocBastard 40
If you don't have anything to say, here's an idea, genius: DON'T SAY ANYTHING.
Legendslayer222 26
I think he's trying to get the badge for writing lots of comments. :p
compasseagle89 8
the amusing part about that is since the comment has been down voted so much, it doesn't count!