Today, my boyfriend and I had sex for the first time. It was amazing, besides for the fact I barely felt him. I pretty much faked the entire thing. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I finally had sex with my boyfriend. I had never gotten so far with a guy, so I was really nervous. He was careful, we tried different positions, "it was fun" and he came. I barely felt anything. FML
Today, I let my boyfriend finger me for the first time. Today, I also learned, after fifteen very, very long minutes of it, how to fake an orgasm. FML
Today, my boyfriend got off for real for the first time during sex. Apparently, he's been faking it for the past two months. I didn't even know guys could do that. FML
Today, I tried faking an orgasm for the first time, because I thought it would be sexy for my boyfriend. He stopped to ask me if I was okay. I guess I'm not good at faking it. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I got intimate. It was his first time, which I guess explains him sticking his hand down my panties and practically bitch-slapping my vagina for the next 20 or 30 seconds. I stupidly faked an orgasm just to get him to stop. Now he thinks he's some kind of sex god. FML
Today, the quality of my sex life reached a new low. I faked my orgasm. And so did he. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I had sex for the first time. Two minutes in, he goes, "Wow, this is strenuous" and stopped. I waited three years for this. FML
Today, my boyfriend of a month and I had sex for the first time. We started in the shower and then moved to his bedroom. He then feel asleep when I was on top. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I had sex for the first time. Instead of moaning like any normal person, he just kept saying stuff like "Uh-huh," "Not too bad," and "Yup" in a complete monotone. It was probably the most uncomfortable experience of my life. FML
Today, I had sex with my boyfriend for the first time. After he'd repeatedly told me not to worry about bleeding, and reassuring me that he'd take care of me, he passed out halfway through. FML
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Top comments
sytd3h5 6
Faking gets you nowhere
BurnInDemonFire 39
If you love him, talk to him about other ways he can get you off. If you don't want to put in the effort to communicate, that's on you.
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Comments (18)
sytd3h5 6
Faking gets you nowhere
Felice Godin 19
should never fake sex would you want your partner to fake sex
Wadlaen 24
There is equipment available in certain stores that you can buy, that you CAN feel all the way in, and then you could just keep your boyfriend for the other stuff you enjoy with him...?
JLS 4
Ugh how awful. Would never want to be with someone who’s penis I couldn’t even feel.
courtalex 5
Yeah because I’m sure her boyfriend is going to be ok with just being there for other stuff and getting no sex just because she isn’t satisfied? If that’s the case then just dump him. He has sexual needs to. If she isn’t ready that’s one thing. But keeping him around knowing she isn’t going to have sex with him because she has other ways to get off is kinda ****** up.
BurnInDemonFire 39
If you love him, talk to him about other ways he can get you off. If you don't want to put in the effort to communicate, that's on you.
ryand82 11
Amazing, without feeling it? Please explain.
RichardPencil 32
Sounds like he's endowed for the friend zone.
fleshyandeasy 3
First time i had sex
Zoey775 16
Was he that small ?
TheOfficialSquib 7
He wouldn’t be having sex if it was Clearly she’s got a hangar where her pussy should be
xica_sp4ever 18
@Squib it makes more sense to your pea brain not that his dick isn’t big enough but she has a “deep ******”? Take an anatomy class or get laid.
bobsanction 18
You must have a very large ******.
JLS 4
You clearly don’t understand female anatomy. Don’t have sex. You aren’t mature or educated enough.
JackFaire 27
Fast forward to complaints about him never getting better