Today, I made brownies for my co-workers. My boss called me into his office, and I though he was going to compliment me on the baking. Instead, he talked about how his 5-year-old daughter can make brownies better than me. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my friend came over with brownies as a treat before work. She works in a bakery so I thought it was lovely. After starting work, I became stoned. She thought it was a great prank. I was fired. FML
Today, someone had been stealing my brownie at work every day, so I sprinkled cocolax on one and waited to find out who the culprit was. Turns out it was my manager. Needless to say, I'm fired. FML
Today, I made a batch of "special" brownies for a party I was going to tonight. I wrapped them up and put them on the counter with a note that said DO NOT EAT. Later on I came home from some errands to find a tray of half eaten brownies and my ten year-old sister passed out on the couch. FML
Today, I ate some amazing homemade brownies that my best friend's wife made for us. She waited till I'd shoved a third one into my mouth before she mentioned she made them with breast milk. Knowing her, I don't even doubt it was true. FML
Today, I was having a really bad day and told my friend at lunch about how stressed I was and he gave me his brownie to cheer me up. After school, he texted me "Did the brownies kick in?" Yes, they did, right in the middle of my English presentation. They were "funny" brownies. FML
Today, I baked some brownies and after my mom ate one, I joked that I put weed in them. Turns out the placebo effect's a bitch, because she quickly started acting high as a kite. One bitch fit later, the brownies are in the trash and I'm grounded until I tell her where I bought the "weed". FML
Today, I asked my boss for a raise. He gave me a cupcake. FML
Today, I accidentally called my boss "Mom." Now she is jokingly telling everyone that I'm the long-lost daughter she gave up for adoption, because she knew I'd be a failure. FML
Today, I had my boss over for dinner. Knowing that I was angling for a promotion, my fifteen-year-old son spent the dinner uttering lines such as "What's the point of showering before bed?" and "Bitches ain't shit but hoes and tricks." My boss was not impressed. FML
Today, I baked some regular brownies for my friend. Just to mess with him, after he ate some, I said they had weed in them. He trashed my room in anger, and still won't believe me when I tell him that I didn't actually slip him any drugs. FML
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Top comments
maverick21703 0
Its a 5 year old. You can drive and stay up past 10. you win.
HaveYouMetTed_fml 0
f**** him ! at least you baked ;)
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Comments (96)
qtips402 7
haha fail xD
PenelopeClearwat 0
fail indeed(: ^
tashbash 0
he's probably just jealous that you can make better brownies than him!
vlovesp 0
what a douche.. lol
Averizzle 0
It's not even hard to make ******* brownies. Ydi for being a tool op.. -.-
Shookitup 0
Epic fail ^.^
StopTheFuckinCar_fml 0
yeah, not gonna lie there's been people who've ****** up brownies & it made me wanna throw them in their face. I hate when people make brownies & they suck & give them to people anyway. YDI, taste your shit before subjecting everyone else to your ass brownies.
Thabb 0
Maybe his daughter could give you lessons?
eazyeeze 0
Next time, just get on your knees and suck his dick. Then ask if his 5 y/o brat can do that better than you
ladies_man217 0
shouldve used a brownie mix
losers_inc 0
really? like really? You're 33 yet you're crying on an fml (predominately targeted to a youthful audience) about your boss liking his daughters brownies more? get over it sweetheart
sabatical 0
shit on his coat!
My2864 1
what does age has anything to do with the taste of te brownies? you either follow the recipe or you dont lmao it aint that hard fyl that you cant make brownies
Justforlolz 14
Lol #37 win. sides just cuz your 33 or whatever doesn't mean you could bake a decent brownie. besides the kid probably uses one of those easy ovens for kids.
deafeningsilence 8
37- hahaha. I laughed because I noticed OP is a male....
E1337ist 0
lol @ 47
BabyDacey 0
haha i love burnt brownies!!!
Einstein714 0
thanks Alan, we baby boomers like to play to
OhWowFYLindeed 0
Pwned! >:D
noobgang7 5
Ouch, FML. Your ego must be so badly bruised that you just want to give up baking... Who the Hell cares if she can make better brownies? Your life is not ******.
erwinbear 0
hahahaha #67 ftw.
TurboTalon 0
This is why I plate anything baked I take in and taste test it beforehand.
sircletus 0
seriously why do you care about your brownie cooking skills that much
SMOKEWEED420420 0
I LOVE BROWNIES
Shookitup 0
I would make another batch and put weed in it and give it to your boss, just to fukk with their day ^.^
HaveYouMetTed_fml 0
f**** him ! at least you baked ;)
qtips402 7
haha cmon you ever tried to make muffins? you take the mix, add water and its its done!
qtips402 7
haha fail i read muffins xD
sabatical 0
you forgot the oven! damn the muffins! XD
qtips402 7
oh yeah thats right I forgot the oven >:O i should be ashamed about myself :P so ya third step, put the muffins or brownies or wtv in the oven for 14minutes and 30 sec (or if u like burnt brownies like babydacey, let them 30 minutes they should be... erm... crispy :D
sabatical 0
yay!
Trollz4daLULZ 2
YDI for not knowing how to cook, even if you are a man.
F_MY_L1FE 0
good try though. It's the though that count.
420smoke420 3
you should have put marijuana in them and ten everyone would have been happy
qtips402 7
yeah i'm sure that the 5 year old girl cant make this kind of brownie :p
SMOKEWEED420420 0
I taught mine to
maverick21703 0
Its a 5 year old. You can drive and stay up past 10. you win.
twinny_sc 13
haha so true!
moodybaby 0
lol #8 & thats so mean, hes so ungrateful. Unless they really tasted like crap :(
GermanBoy0_0 0
Shouldve grabbed a brownie and shoved it down his throat
lolwtfwasthat 0
good game
Jimboom 12
If he didn't like them then he shouldn't have had one. Tell him where he can stick his 8yr olds brownies! Either that or like #8 said. Make special brownies next time and then everyone will love them, also a perfect time to ask for a raise after that. ;-)