Today, I'm found out I'm pregnant. My husband and I spoke at length about how we were going to handle things, which included him "forbidding" me from having an epidural, because he doesn't want our baby to "come out addicted to drugs." FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, I found out I'm pregnant. My husband reacted by going out and smoking weed, then getting completely shitfaced, and having his buddies drag his nearly-comatose carcass back home from a strip club. FML
Today, I found out that my unborn son has an abnormally large head. I have an abnormally small and narrow pelvis, and I'm allergic to local anesthetic, so no epidural or spinal for me. FML
Today, I found out my husband has been telling everyone he doesn't want a baby. He has been telling me he does. We have been trying for months. I'm now pregnant and confused. FML
Today, I learned that not only am I pregnant, I'm too far along for an abortion. My husband and I originally bonded over the fact that we both hate children. FML
Today, I had the abortion my husband and I agreed on, after multiple forms of birth control failed. His family somehow found out, and now they're all mad at us for not telling them I was ever pregnant, with a child we never wanted, and took precautions to avoid creating. FML
Today, I called my ex and told him I was pregnant with his child. He was thrilled, going on and on about how much he wanted to be a dad. I had to tell him I was going to abort it. FML
Today, during the birth of my first child, my epidural didn't work. FML
Today, I found out my husband is having a baby. Too bad I'm not pregnant. FML
Today, I told my husband I might want a baby, so he took me to visit his best friend who has a toddler and we stayed for an hour. I no longer want a baby. I want the pill wrapped in 2 condoms and a joint vasectomy/hysterectomy paid for with my non-baby disposable income, and my husband now has a shit eating grin. FML
Today, I found out that I'm pregnant. I also found out that the dad has a fiancée. FML
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Top comments
TheGewt 7
He will change his mind when you break his hand going into labor.
batwomen_fml 7
He's not the one pushing a baby out of his vag. Tell him it's your choice. And, sometimes doctors really want people to get them, so that they don't pass out from pain.
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Comments (151)
hqbrat 8
What a good husband ;)
Michaelsgirl04 9
psh. you tell him to go shoot a 9 pound child out of his wiener without any drugs. see how that goes
om102907 4
This guy is a douche. An epideral is a local anesthetic put in your spinal space to numb you. Its not in ur blood stream. You married a idiot Happy Mother's Day!
Anna191919 2
Let him watch a video of a woman giving birth. If possible a very detailed one. Add some information about an epidural and then hope he'll change his mind ;) If not, have an epidural anyway.
MEM0817 18
Thank you! Since this is my first delivery I have no idea how I'm going to tolerate birth, so thats why I have my birth plan which I realize could go the complete opposite I want it to or could go the way I want it to. I do refuse to get induced though. My OB is very much on board with what I want. She's amazing! Congrats on wanting to become a midwife. I'm going to go back to school to get my PA. :]
menacingsprite 3
A real genius you married there.
babyshaft408 8
Seriously people r really fucken stupid these days
van__hawthorne 12
Well, I hope he enjoys the gut-wrenching pain, as well as the other realities of pregnancy, such as the high likelihood you will shit yourself. Tell your man to educate himself.
looneytoongirl 0
Just do it and if he complains tell him he's not the one having the baby!
docscientist 10
It's stupidity like this that holds us all back.