Today, I took my friend to the E.R. for an eye infection. While waiting, I proclaimed, "Why, Jesus?!" jokingly. Well, the gigantic biker sitting next to me, who had found religion in prison and is a born again Christian, was not pleased. He spent the next four hours trying to convert me. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my friend and I were driving to work, when she asked me to stop at the gas station. Ten minutes later, I see this woman come out, my friend right behind her. The woman spotted me, an intense look in her eyes. She marched over, threw a paper at me, and screamed, "Jesus died for our sins!" She then stormed off. I'm a crazy magnet. FML
Today, while on the tramway with my friend, we ended up discussing religion. When we started talking about God, some guy asked us, in a serious tone, to "stop talking about me" because it was really starting to bother him. FML
Today, I was mugged by a street preacher. The same one who'd earlier in the day screamed at me for being an evil sinner. FML
Today, I made a new friend. He seemed pretty cool, until we came to the topic of religion and the ancient alien theory. I'm seemingly now friends with a guy who thinks alien Jesus raped an Earth woman, and we're the resulting cross-breed. FML
Today, I yet again had to endure one of my patients talking about how their "faith in God" helped them. No bitch, the MEDICINE helped you, not your fake "God" who hates queer people like me. I wish I could yank your IV and see how much help "God" is to you then. FML
Today, I told my roommate that I was an atheist and she laughed. I left and returned to find her and her prayer group praying for my soul. She told me to accept Jesus Christ as my lord and savior. I said no. Then she told me to find somewhere else to live. FML
Today, a drunk man wearing a sandwich-board proclaiming that, "The end is nigh" threw some so-called holy water at me while bellowing, "It's what Jesus would've wanted" and that I should "repent for being an evil shite." FML
Today, I was in the Walmart parking lot listening to some music in my car and some lady comes up to me and say, “Boy, the music you listen to is so unholy, I think you need some Jesus in your life.” FML
Today, I made the mistake of sneezing in front of a hyper religious customer, who for ten minutes blamed the incident of shifting weather patterns that signaled the return of Jesus, who was as she explained, upset about the abortion rates in America and President Obama. FML
Today, I had to explain to my rabidly religious brother how two transvestites can buy fish at Petco while he's buying the same fish at the same Petco, and it doesn't equate to hitting on him. It's been two hours, and he's still sitting outside my door reading Bible verses and praying aggressively. FML
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Top comments
0ops_fml 0
Today I was in the ER and this guy with a really gross eye infection say down next to me. I made up some stupid crap about how he should find God but he wouldn't take the hint and sit somewhere else, even after 4 hours. FML.
tramplife 0
I think it is stupid when believers try and convert non-believers. Nothing against people who have fait and believe in religion I just find it completly disrespectful when someone trys to convert somone. its the same when a non believer trys to convince a believer its just disrespectful
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Comments (81)
MechaMew2 0
#1 You don't walk away from a gigantic biker unless you WANT to be beat up.
that_suuuucks 0
#11, he said he was taking his F R I E N D. and that's just stupid.
samtime 0
U realy should be willingvto tell someone to shut up. Religion is bogus but some people think god is real so sometimes it just takes a a shut up to get someone of it back.
elliekinslurvsya 0
i would have yelled at the jackass. then i would have run.
kpearsall 0
YDI, why did you go to the emergency room for something that isn't an emergency? And why were acting like a cantankerous child? Oh, wai-
Lagunaguitar 0
i hate people like that. I'm and atheist... In Kansas, the bible belt. I'm 13 and when I told my friends, they wouldn't let up. I hate how ignorant these people are. I respect them for believing in god. they don't respect me for what I think. atheists need a holiday or movement, our voices need to be heard
Chocolate_Chunk 2
The hard truth is that you should act like the others. It may not really be brave, but in the Bible Belt, it's healthier. Wait until you're 16-18 before 'coming out of the closet'
MareNostrum 0
Why hide your beliefs like that?
aceman50000 4
If your an atheist all you do is disrespect christians
crazy4uboi 6
As a christian I know that from the start we are told to tell others about God but I also see where you are coming from there is a fine line between telling others about God and just down right disrespecting your deacon to not be a Christian...
SoulFrog 7
I'm in the same situation but when my friends try to convert me I just walk away from them then they get it through their thick skulls that I don't want to talk about the topic of religion
KYTRwerepyre 0
i hate people like that too... especially since ive got enough religion on my plat (im a pantho-neo-pagan catholic christian... wow thats a mouth full...)
LeBron2332 0
could have been worse, he could have killed you
thedaish 0
Um... yeah.
trueamericanman 0
athiest ****
Ascalon 2
...you didn't even spell 'atheist' right. It's rude to call him an 'atheist ****' out of nowhere. You don't know the man.
Brendan3693 0
r u the preachy guy he's talking about? take your religious crap to imaloser.com. and I'm Christian, FYI
pomegranate0618 0
lmao nice