Today, I was sitting on the wooden edge of my coffee table watching my sister's boyfriend play Halo 2, when I leaned back to stretch and shattered the center pane of glass in the table. I now have a large gash in my ass. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I accidentally slammed my leg against the coffee table. It was only after I went to the bathroom a few minutes later that I realized there's now a massive gash on my upper leg. I also got in trouble for yelling, "SON OF A BITCH!" as soon as the impact occurred. FML
Today, my friend hit a glass with her arm, so I dove to try and catch it before it hit the ground and shattered. I hit my head against the table, giving me a nice gash that needed stitches. The glass was actually plastic. FML
Today, I was cleaning my room and set my burnt out light bulb on my computer chair without any second thought. Later, I sat on the chair, the light bulb shattered and I got a huge gash on my butt. FML
Today, I was sitting at the computer browsing various websites. In my attempt to scoot the chair forward, I hit my knee against the desk that my computer was on, and ended up breaking it. I literally broke my knee sitting on my ass. FML
Today, I was walking into my living room when I slipped over the carpet, bashed my head on my glass table, and was moaning in pain on the floor. My parents came running when they heard my head bang… straight to the table, to see if there were any scratches on it. FML
Today, I passed out. I fell to the hardwood floor, cut my chin, and bit through my lip. Fortunately, my brother was there to help stop the bleeding and get me some water. All I had to do was wait until he finished his game of Call of Duty. FML
Today, while playing ping pong, my brother got mad that he lost and threw the paddle at my head, causing me to fall backwards into the TV mounted on the wall. Now I have a concussion and have to pay to replace the TV. FML
Today, while washing dishes for my friend, I managed to break an unbreakable glass and slice my hand open on it. FML
Today, my mom bumped into a table with a glass vase on it. Seeing that the vase was about to fall, I lunged to catch it. Before I got there, the vase fell and shattered, resulting in me diving into the broken shards. FML
Today, I tried to show off my dance moves at a party and ended up falling through a glass table. FML
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Top comments
ohSNAPyall 27
I hate it when that happens. What a pain in the ass.
akiranozaki 0
Chair. Learn to use one.
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Comments (111)
Vayant 0
Go see a doctor? Haha.
pongmaster 0
Yeah, really? of course he'd see a doctor, if it was really bad he would have to gonto the hospital. Man, that sucks doorknob OP
cartermc17 0
dumb twat lol ydi if u want anpace to sit sit on A fking chair
Bugatti_Veyron 1
why did you deliberitly lean back to shatter the glass?
Stalker191 0
Lmao
BboyHero 0
ydi for not playing mw2
kingbirdy23 0
halo 2 kicks MW2's ass. have you ever played it? it is the iteration of awesome in a FPS.
daknox 0
it's called sitting on the couch then you wouldn't have that problem
AVainAttempt 0
^This and Halo 2 halo 3 and modern warfare 2 are the best games ever, let us not forget super jumping and modding back in the day :D but bungie killed that fun..
DonkeyDelight 0
Yeah, it's called your but.t hole.
1177matt 0
halo is nerdy game your shooting blue aliens mw2 its more realistic in Halo you were a metal suit wtf is with that it would be way too heavy and you jump like your on trampoline is ******* retarted. im ******* 12 and my friends 6 year old brother thinks halo's gay
Eviktion 0
gtfo ******, you're to young for this website anyways
IDontFlush 3
It's scifi. If you knew something about the background of the game, you would know that the devs know the suit is supposed to weight half a ton and accounted for it
warom 0
Don't be such a fat ass all the time and you won't get gashes in your asses
ReyEr9412 0
Number 80 is so adorable when he tries to bash a game that takes place 500 years in the future. Unless he has been to the year 2500, then he cannot say whether or not halo is unrealistic. If you had told Columbus that people would fly around in giant metal birds and instantaneously talk to each other through invisible waves and watch moving pictures he would have said that you were not making any sense.
Clare420 0
uhhh. FYL cause your fat. on a side note...YDI for being fat. know your weight and don't put all your weight on one surface without being certain it can hold your fat ass.
w12345 2
why sit on a GLASS table?
WeezyBites 6
@ #80 - Wow, what an argument. Surely 6 year olds have a great taste in games.
pieintheface 0
Wow, 80, there's a guide that explains everything. Just close the app, press it till it shakes, then press the x.
hiphopchick7 1
u have no life
heybetch66 1
Firstly, I'm a ******* idiot. Secondly, next time sit on a ******* chair.
garrettjordan 0
umm ouchie
observesandgasps 0
op deserves it. who plays halo 2 anymore.
Averizzle 0
Damn #2 fail?
Otto12 0
we all fail, but #2 failed the most
ddddddddg 9
I hate to be the bearer of bad news 'just kidding' but you're second
ohSNAPyall 27
I hate it when that happens. What a pain in the ass.
advent2060 4
how much of a fat ass are u and the OP?
jeromeco32 0
now you have two cracks lol
CookiesNOJ 0
Thats what u get for being a *****
i8muf4t 0
who still still plays halo 2??
Metzler31 17
haha I don't know, that's what I was thinking
StarWolf111 21
It's a good game, don't judge.
happypenguins 24
This post was from five years ago
_Hazmat 21
Before commenting please look at when the COMMENT was posted.
RaggedSquirrel 0
Ydi for sitting on a table dumbass. Besides, you should have chosen one that could actually take the load.
saltz 0
more for sitting on a glass table
akiranozaki 0
Chair. Learn to use one.
TheDaveCA 1
Who the hell still plays Halo 2?
Kee_1992 0
shit. sounds sore.
DogmaT_fml 4
you just added two letters to your ass glass. thats hella expensive for a large pain of glass.
lolmaster7654321 4
u mean pane of glass or pain in the ass?