Today, despite having a mild case of the flu, I visited my boyfriend's house and watched a movie with his parents. During the movie, I felt the sudden urge to sneeze. Trying to hold it in, I managed to do the loudest fart I've ever done in my life. Everyone heard. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my boyfriend's parents visited us. When everyone was chatting in the room, I needed to go to the bathroom. I got up and wanted to walk away when I sneezed, and farted at the same time. I thought they didn't hear it, until my boyfriend's brother said, "That wasn't just a sneeze was it?" FML
Today, while in class, I had to sneeze. Not wanting to make a lot of noise, I held it in, only to instead let out a huge, long fart. Everyone, including the teacher, turned and stared at me intently. FML
Today, I was in a meeting when I felt a sneeze coming on. I tried to hold it in to avoid making a noise. Instead, I ended up sneeze-imploding so hard that I accidentally farted at the same time. The entire room went silent. FML
Today, I retook my ACT. I have been fighting a cold all week and have been very sneezy lately. Midway through the test, I got the urge to sneeze. Since it was very quiet and I didn't want to disturb the peace, I tried to hold my sneeze in. I ended up letting out a huge fart instead. FML
Today, I was in a quiet library, trying to stifle a sneeze. In the process, I let out an embarrassingly loud and dramatic snort that echoed through the room. Heads turned. Many stared. FML
Today, I was in a meeting with my boss and some new clients when I sensed that I was about to sneeze. I tried to hold it in, but ended up sneezing AND farting. FML
Today, I was giving a presentation in front of my class. Mid-speech, I felt a sudden urge to sneeze and tried to hold it in. Instead, I let out the most obnoxious, window-rattling sneeze imaginable, complete with a spray of snot, which landed on my notes. I think I traumatized my classmates for life. FML
Today, I sneezed. My boyfriend told me to shut up. FML
Today, I went to a very crowded restaurant. Being really shy, I requested to sit in the corner, but instead they placed me in the center of the dinning area. I started to eat my food and got really spaced out. Suddenly I sneeze-farted and everyone turned to look at me. FML
Today, I was nervously observing a delicate medical procedure while training at my new job. I tried to stifle a sneeze and instead (as you can probably guess) ripped the biggest, most cartoonishly loud fart of my life. My ass sounded like a tuba and I was asked to leave the room. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
BoratSagdiyev 2
Be proud. Own that shit.
TheDrifter 24
The pressure has to go somewhere. Just be glad out came out dry.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (112)
copo37 7
Should've looked straight at his mother with a stone cold face and said, " try and top that."
rott3n 6
So you sneezed out your butt?
DocBastard 40
Don't you know that when you hold in a sneeze, you kill 50,000 brain cells?! ...or so my mother tried to tell me when I was a kid. I'm not exactly sure what her source was, but I'm thinking Mad Magazine.
NeonPopRocks 14
Actually, I've heard a lot of the time that it's when you sneeze, brain cells die. Oh, and the smell of Sharpies is supposed to kill brain cells too.
gc327072 31
^the thing about sharpies is a fact. But sneezing? Lawl
wolfhausen 7
No. Sneezing doesn't kill brain cells! it's a way your body gets rid of unwanted irritants that could cause infection!
BossPathfinderGM 14
So said the blonde CORRECTLY.
mintcar 10
That's pretty embarrassing, but next time just sneeze. I don't get why you held it in in the first place.
RosaYobany9288 2
It can happen to anyone OP. sorry for the embarrasing moment though. Im sure you will laugh about it in the near future.
SirCharles83 13
Noor, I didn't want to say anything...but there's a guy RIGHT behind you wielding some sort of blade.
NeonPopRocks 14
YDI for going there when you're sick. They could catch it and get sick too.
RedPillSucks 33
Not disgusting, but you do have some control. OP could have excused herself to another room. My son rips them all the time during dinner. I keep telling him to get his nasty ass to the bathroom. All he does is yell "Safty!". Teenagers today... smh.
ScOrPiOnloool 6
What did u do after ?
doctorhook86 25
42: Don't worry, that's just her husband. "Honey, can you come help me dice some vegetables for dinner?"