Today, after a great first date, he leaned in to kiss me. I held my breath slightly. This resulted in me breathing out through my nose, blowing a huge snot bubble, which then burst on his face. He looked at me in horror and walked away. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was on a date with a girl and everything was going great. As I took her back to her house and walked her to her door, I leaned in for a kiss. She seemed to really enjoy it, so I went for another but as I leaned in again, I sneezed uncontrollably, shooting her face with saliva and snot. FML
Today, I took my girlfriend to the movies. She's pretty conservative and I decided after four dates to give her her first ever kiss. As I leaned in she violently sneezed and hit me in the nose with the hand she brought up to cover her face. I broke my nose and got blood down her cleavage. FML
Today, I was on my third date with this really cute girl. After a very romantic evening, I decided to go for the first kiss, but because of my nervous reflex in which I get bloody noses, I ended up bleeding all over her face. FML
Today, while on a first date, I leaned in to kiss her, but my lips somehow brushed against her nose instead. I panicked and ended up kissing her forehead like a grandma saying goodbye to a child. FML
Today, my date kissed me after our second date. The way he leaned towards my mouth was very romantic. He's pretty tall, so I stretched myself as high as possible to make the kiss as passionate as possible. That's how I ended up belching into his mouth. FML
Today, during a date, I discovered that if I cough with my mouth closed, snot will spray from my nose all over the place like some kind of mucus cannon. FML
Today, I tried kissing my boyfriend on the tip of his nose. He sneezed mid-kiss and headbutted me. Now, there's just an awkward silence. FML
Today, at the dentist, I was getting my teeth cleaned. Looking up at his nose, I saw runny snot dripping onto his lip. I tried to slowly move away. He told me "Stop!" The movement of his lips caused the snot to fall right into my mouth. FML
Today, I was watching a romantic comedy at my boyfriend's house. During the make out scene, I decided to go in for a kiss. He apparently decided to belch at the same time. I could taste it. FML
Today, I went on a blind date. Everything was going great until I laughed so hard at one of his jokes that I snorted, choked on my drink, and accidentally slapped his face while trying to cover my mouth. We didn't order dessert. FML
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Top comments
shellz102 12
That' snot a good thing!
DingoCJ 15
You expected him to blow one back?
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Comments (80)
shellz102 12
That' snot a good thing!
GuessWhatKids 13
The chances of a second date are snot looking very good!
joshszz_fml 4
Yeah, hate to burst your bubble.
Albarufus 13
Snot fair sometimes. :(
hama806 19
At least the big snot bubble didn't accompany a big hard green booger. That would have been worse. Sorry OP.
dhooks111490 8
None of you are funny
Posthuman 26
I sneeze what you did there ;D
NashyzzleTheN 10
Nice face^^
shellz102 12
41- nobody asked for your opinion.
stitesy29 18
No they're snot Actually they are i just wanted to say that :)
xknightlightx 2
It's not supposed to be so bad either.. The snot has nothing to do with the heaet personality and much more
dinorider_fml 4
Everyone nose that it snot a good thing
pickles1994 18
Is it weird I sneezed 5 times after reading this ..
shellz102 12
That' snot a good thing!
DingoCJ 15
You expected him to blow one back?
onlychildFTW 34
I think OP ruined any chance to date him. That really is just disgusting. But how do you blow a snot bubble? I've never seen that in real life, ever.
iOceanus 18
Personally, I wouldn't have cared. It happens. I would have wiped it off and continued with the kiss. Besides, it can be a funny memory to bring up if you keep dating!
perdix 31
At that moment, a queef would have been less awkward. Looks like you blew it.
kitkatkit 4
Or she should've blew it... Then maybe there wouldn't have been snot bubbles
gc327072 31
Just...no
gc327072 31
19- true, my dad will always fart and blame it on the creaking floor. "Dad, I'm not 5, I know tile doesn't creak."
zandalee 20
Don't look now Noor but there is an extremely scarey looking dude behind you!
cheshireau 26
Did a 4 year old write this? The wording a horrendous.
Nadron 21
I guess you figured out that holding your breath was not your best option.
WritingWrongs 8
I hate to be harsh but OP definitely deserved this, she's obviously old enough to know when she needs to blow her nose.My three year old nephew could figure this one out.
Discombobulated9 12
#39 Our bodies do fail us sometimes. I always blow my nose, but that snot bubble has happened to me as well (unfortunately). We're all human and we all stumble across the most embarrassing moments that involves our bodies humiliating us; it doesn't mean we deserve it, it just means we're human.
WritingWrongs 8
To be honest, that comment was poorly worded... what I meant was that it was the OP's fault, not that she deserved it, sorry for the confusion. (I'll go ahead and thumb this comment down)
TheDrifter 24
Wipe his face clean and try again, but a little lower. He'll forgive you, I promise.
toastboy94 2
You don't know that! *****
RedPillSucks 33
A lot lower, and she'll own him for life.
SenselessPattern 12
Too far down and your back to square 1 though.
TheDrifter 24
What, you don't go got toe worship?
winnerme123 8
Trust me, most men would do the same thing.
cheshireau 26
Did a 4 year old write this? The wording is horrendous.
BulldogHoops 14
Then re-write it in your far superior way.
gc327072 31
Because op said in to instead of into? Whatever it is, it isn't detracting any meaning, so STFU>FO!
doodlecloud 27
Good luck with the rest of the internet 14.
loserman67 36
He should have just laughed it off and gone for the kiss. Sounds likes he's a little too uptight. You're probably better off with him gone. Find a guy with a sense of humor. I'd say he's snot the one for you.
Xcherrypie 16
Nailed it in the final sentence! Bravo!