Today, my boyfriend accused me of not coming home at all last week. The truth is, I was up and gone to work before him every morning, and I was home after he went to bed. He didn’t even bother talking to me or asking where I was last week, we both work 24/7 on-call jobs, and he knows this happens sometimes. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I got a call from my boyfriend's boss. She was wondering if he was okay, since he hasn't shown up to work for the past two weeks. Now I'm wondering where he's been going when he leaves the house each day. FML
Today, I got a phone call from my boyfriend, who screamed at me for being a f-ing liar and never taking time for him. He'd called my work and knew I wasn't there as I said I'd be. He was right - I was lying. I'd been driving for the past 10 hours to his family's beach house to surprise him. FML
Today, my boyfriend called work because he is sick. Then he called me four times while I was working, to complain that I was working, and then he got mad when I told him I was sick and worked a double shift two days in a row, because apparently that's "insensitive" of me. FML
Today, my boyfriend wanted me to sleep over at his house. Then he found out that it was that time of the month for me, so he told me that he had to work this weekend and said "see you sometime next week." He doesn't have a job. FML
Today, I woke up early, showered, dressed, and made the 40 minute drive to work, only to discover when I arrived that today was my day off. When I got home my live in boyfriend was gone. I called and he told me he was at the beach, right near my work. FML
Today, my boyfriend forgot to pick me up from work. We work at the same place. FML
Today, my boyfriend told me he wouldn't be able to cover his share of the rent because he didn't work during the week, saying business has been slow. I checked and found out he called in sick four times. He wanted to stay home and watch online gaming matches. FML
Today, I got yelled at multiple times by my boss because my boyfriend didn't show up to work. FML
Today, I was told I'm lazy by my boyfriend because I skipped work. He skips his all the time and when I get home still have to cook and clean up after him. FML
Today, I found out my husband wasn’t really “working from home” in the evenings. He locks himself in his office until the late hours of the night, having intimate Skype sessions with his coworker. That explains why our joint bank account hasn’t seen a direct deposit this past month. FML
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Top comments
acmariner99 25
Communication! Do it!
jbuckets_404 39
OP, every time that you come home from now on, "cannonball yourself" onto him (aka "pile-drive") while he's sleeping to let him know that you are, in fact, home after your daily shift. Then do it one more time ie, the next day, after he "mea culpa's" just to "remind" him. Problem solved! Or one day, hide all his underwear; next day, all his socks, etc. so that he has to call you to find out where you moved 'em to each day.
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Comments (5)
Charlie Given 28
Sounds like he may have a guilty conscience.
RichardPencil 32
You're too busy for a boyfriend. You should be a side piece or have an FWB. Problem solved, YWIA
acmariner99 25
Communication! Do it!
TooTall0231 9
Damn! I'm working the same hours as I'm on call right now.
jbuckets_404 39
OP, every time that you come home from now on, "cannonball yourself" onto him (aka "pile-drive") while he's sleeping to let him know that you are, in fact, home after your daily shift. Then do it one more time ie, the next day, after he "mea culpa's" just to "remind" him. Problem solved! Or one day, hide all his underwear; next day, all his socks, etc. so that he has to call you to find out where you moved 'em to each day.