Today, I finally hooked up with a boy I really liked. We were lying in bed and my panties were already off when he asked me, "Would you also have sex with me if you weren't drunk?" I responded "Yes!" and asked him the same question, to which he responded, "No, probably not." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was lying on my bed with my boyfriend. I didn't really want to have sex so I told him I would if he really wanted too, but I wouldn't enjoy it. He then started to undo my pants. FML
Today, I was trying on a shirt and asked my boyfriend if he liked it. He replied, "If I say no, can we still have sex tonight?" FML
Today, I went out drinking with my friends and my boyfriend met me there. We then decided to come home, planning an intimate moment. Once home, I got on top of him and went to kiss his neck. Next thing I know, I'd fallen asleep right before we'd even started. FML
Today, I was feeling frisky and asked my boyfriend if he wanted a blowjob. He said, "Fuck no", then rolled over to go to sleep. FML
Today, while at a party, my extremely drunk crush came up to me and told me she had a crush on me. She then wanted to have sex with me while drunk, but since she was under the influence, I didn't. Later, when I told her about it, she say denied the fact that she likes me. FML
Today, my drunk boyfriend told me he thought of new positions for us to try in bed because it was getting boring. We haven't had sex yet. FML
Today, while my boyfriend was sleeping, I got naked and sat on top of him. He woke up and I asked him if he would rather stay awake or go back to sleep, in hopes that he would stay awake and want to do some naughty stuff with me. His response? To grab my butt, and then go back to sleep. FML
Today, I got a call from my very drunk boyfriend at 1:30am asking for my permission to have sex with a "gross fat chick" he met at a pub, because he "felt sorry for her." The conversation ended with me getting hung up on, because I "don't have a heart." FML
Today, my inebriated boyfriend and I were having sex. He rolled off of me without finishing, and said, "I'm bored." FML
Today, I had sex with a guy I've liked for ages. We were lying in his bed afterwards, and he mumbled the word "happy". I thought it was really sweet, until he repeated himself. "My girlfriend probably won't be too happy about this." FML
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Top comments
hurr 0
I'm just guessing that he was kidding -- no man is stupid enough to say that BEFORE he gets laid, drunk or not.
emilypancakes 0
you better not have slept with him after that.
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Comments (33)
casanova_fml 0
see? There are some questions that ugly women just shouldn't ask. "Does this dress make my ass look big?" -"Nope, but the Rolls and cellulite do."
Eir_fml 1
7 and 10 I can see. I know I would have said the same thing. In my case, it would be because I just have some inhibitions. But I'm not the type to hook up either.
alwaysalady 0
Don't have sex while drunk. Its a bad idea. And really don't have sex with douchebags.
AliSama 17
If he would not sleep with you when he was sober, it does not mean he doesn't like what you look like. Alcohol can get past inhibitions and other stuff. Meaning he may not sleep with you due to culture or wanting to wait etc. who knows, unless you ask him. Here is the question one must ask though. IF she was a he. Meaning the girl said, "no i would not sleep with you." How differently would the views be? double standards?
bluBear24 0
what is he's just death shy? you know, alcohol helps people get over that stuff sometimes. I'd say be straightforward and just ask. It doesn't necessarily mean he doesn't like you
mizled 0
wooooooooooow. if you slept with him, you're an idiot.
RelentlessBoner 0
Then maybe you shouldn't be getting wasted and ******* guys at parties
jsmith1199 4
at least he's honest.. and if u like him so much quit complaining u should be lucky that he's drunk enough to let u bang him
HuDanny 0
CHAMP LOLZ
MetalCraze 11
well if you hook up with random guys expect them to be blunt If you lower yourself to that level why should he think more of you?