Today, my boyfriend and I got into a serious argument and he stormed out of the house mad. Why? I wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of his knob. FML
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Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
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Today, I realized how visibly upset my boyfriend got whenever a certain female friend leaves. When my other friend and I teased him about secretly being in love with her, he completely lost it. He threw a temper tantrum, spilled milkshake all over the floor, and stormed out of the mall. It was just a joke. FML
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Top comments
HowieDoIt 21
Would she prefer whipped cream and nuts?
perdix 31
What's wrong with you? Chocolate syrup is so great, I'll bet a lot of dudes who aren't even gay would lick it off. Not me, I'm on a diet.
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Comments (160)
cja33 8
Ya....? im not to sure about your boyfriend? hahah
buckeyed 20
ya...? im not sure the point of your comment? hahah
BellaBelle_fml 23
Put a damn shirt on and stop groping yourself.
kremmel 12
Send him storming over this way!
TheElBurrrito 21
I think you meant, "Send him a cummin this way."
no_lungs 16
Damn Kremmel, need a fix? I would love to help you out with that!
perdix 31
What's wrong with you? Chocolate syrup is so great, I'll bet a lot of dudes who aren't even gay would lick it off. Not me, I'm on a diet.
PincessBoff 6
"Not me, I'm on a diet." You've made my day, perdix.
stevenJB 25
Million dollar idea ^
j_cat187 20
Perhaps if I use sugar free syrup?
challan 19
According to many studies, a daily dose of dark chocolate is good for both your heart and your metabolism. *PASSES 86 HERSHEYS SPECIAL DARK SYRUP* Get to snackin' Perdix
perdix 31
#106, if I gotta get it off some dude's knob, it looks like I'll die young. Maybe if you could figure out a better delivery system, I could live into ripe old age.
GrinchFu1 27
Were you on the toilet when he asked? There's gotta be a good reason why you said no... Chocolate has gotta taste better than skin and sweat!
perdix 31
#21, Huh, she's on the toilet? I think you need to review the Official Blumpkin Manual to clear up any confusion of who goes where.
TheElBurrrito 21
There's an official manual for that, Perdix? Hopefully I haven't been doing it wrong this whole time.
GrinchFu1 27
I think you should read my post one more time. It can't be that confusing.
GrinchFu1 27
Is there no reverse Blumpkin? Now I've confused myself...
perdix 31
#66, no, Manuel wrote the manual ;)
perdix 31
#104, good recovery. For that, I have a special chocolate chip Eggo for you!
GAOStarr 15
If you lick his chocolate, I bet he'll return the favor when you're wanting.
The_Thinker 18
Relax, OP. You can't lose your figure over a little chocolate syrup. I mean, clearly that's the problem here, not so?
martinv19 6
Everyone knows its better with Nutella!
RedPillSucks 33
Don't be silly. He wouldn't have a knob left if he used nutella. She's have this look on her face, like ... Oops! sorry. and he'd be all ... Ahhhhrrggg!!!!!
perdix 31
#28, she'd be on it until he "busted a Nutella" on her.
dilley86 4
Door knobs are filthy, why would he do that? Geez.
RoboCunnilingus 23
Well, why wouldn't you? Let your freak flag fly, girl.
BobTheBob413 3
Well the OP doesn't give much info. Did she just get home from a long day, collapse on the couch, and say I'm exhausted and he popped out of the kitchen and poke it in her face? Did she tell him OMG NO! That's disgusting why would you do that you sick freak?!?! Did she tell him, wow that's sexy and I'll love to do it but I'm so exhausted I just need to lay in your arms and relax, and then later I'll be up for desert? Does he never go downtown? Does she always expect him to go downtown?