Nutella then?
Today, my boyfriend and I got into a serious argument and he stormed out of the house mad. Why? I wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of his knob. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I got into a serious argument and he stormed out of the house mad. Why? I wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of his knob. FML
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Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, my husband had a temper tantrum because I wouldn't get him a chocolate bar at the store register. FML
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Today, my boyfriend was disgusted because I dropped a Skittle on the floor and ate it. He thought peeing on me in the shower was just fine. FML
Today, after eating out with my boyfriend, we went for a drive, but ended up getting into an argument. I reached back to grab my bag and storm out of the car. He thought I was trying to take the restaurant's doggy bag and lunged at me. My boyfriend would rather save chicken than our relationship. FML
Today, my boyfriend gave me a fancy chocolate candy and I got angry at him for forgetting that I'm allergic to chocolate and threw the candy into the garbage disposal. Turns out, he had spent a ton of money getting a chocolatier to put an engagement ring inside the candy that I just destroyed. FML
Today, I got into an argument, followed by the silent treatment from my boyfriend, because I told him that he should change his underwear daily. FML
Today, I was being playful with my boyfriend and put a chocolate between my legs. He bit the chocolate. My lips too... FML
Today, I got into a huge fight with my boyfriend after driving 200 miles to see him. While arguing, I told him I never wanted to see him again and left after slamming the front door. I left my car keys in his kitchen. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I got into a heated argument. He raised his hand like he was going to hit me. Having been hit by my ex before, I panicked and instinctively kicked his legs out from under him. He then dumped me because he said he was just gonna scare me, but I used real violence on him. FML
Today, I realized how visibly upset my boyfriend got whenever a certain female friend leaves. When my other friend and I teased him about secretly being in love with her, he completely lost it. He threw a temper tantrum, spilled milkshake all over the floor, and stormed out of the mall. It was just a joke. FML
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Top comments
HowieDoIt 21
Would she prefer whipped cream and nuts?
perdix 31
What's wrong with you? Chocolate syrup is so great, I'll bet a lot of dudes who aren't even gay would lick it off. Not me, I'm on a diet.
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Comments (160)
MDTeddy 13
A lot of people in he comments see no problem with this. I find it ******* weird that he did that. Also, that is no reason to be upset about. She said no now clean yourself up and never do that again. Maybe there would be a better chance withoutfood involved.
charvisioku 22
Why is it weird? Do you usually find oral sex weird? If not, there's no reason to think this is; if anything it would make it easier for people who don't like giving it. There are much stranger fetishes out there.
jelly713 19
I agree 122, I think it's weird he didn't confirm with OP first before barging in like that. Should have checked if OP had a long day, or was in the mood for that. He should have some class and ask first.
otecasacid 22
assuming you had sexuality in your relationship, and you werent the kind of girl who was scared to hold his hand in public because "people might get the wrong idea", why the hell not? It was a nice gesture, guys know girls love chocolate. shoulda been a winwin
egrudy 9
What's a matter you don't like chocolate?
buddy51 23
OP- your bf's a chocolate-syrup covered dick! Good you said no to his little high-carb knob-licking scheme! You're better off without him and his confectionary fetishes!! First a choc-knob, then a marzipan *****! After that, who knows where this could have gone!! Change your locks, keep him gone. You'll be a happier woman with fewer cavities and better health!!!
aliciaanomalyyxo 12
Why not?!
meintx 9
I can understand maybe not being in the mood, but it was chocolate. Hmm... not sure I've ever turned down chocolate. But I think we are missing a lot of info here. Was the chocolate a bribe for you're lack of oral satisfaction? Was he simply trying to add some flair to your foreplay? Or does he just take for granted that you will blow him whenever based on previous history?
unwantedmemories 5
Well, I don't get why you turned him down. I never turned down a chocolate offer ever. Especially on the hindsight of having sexual intimacy/pleasing my guy to make him feel better etc.. I LOVE CHOCOLATE!
KingCeltic77 18
That's how the "Chocolate" Guy from Spongebob gives blows.
Lilo4life 26
Sounds like a quality guy.
freshko21 6
Is that you in this picture? You are beautiful!! I would so take you out for Ice cream!
XxKillerStormXx 13
He must love bj's and chocolate.