Today, my mom watched a Dr. Phil episode. She's now hysterical because she assumes me and my friends are involved in sex parties. All because a man on the TV said so. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my mom decided to take away my TV after noticing that I watch the show True Blood. Apparently, since I watch this, I must be "curious about sex." I'm 19. FML
Today, I realized just how messed up my life is, thanks to all the scare stories my wife sees on Dr Phil. She's now convinced that I'll start beating her someday. She's started taking martial arts classes, and threatens to use her skills every time I get even slightly frustrated with her. FML
Today, I was watching a movie that had a mild sex scene in it. My mother walked in just as that scene was starting and she flipped out. I'm now grounded. She's taken my TV and laptop out of my room and refuses to let me see my boyfriend because she's sure he's the cause of my "disgusting behaviour". FML
Today, I heard my parents having sex for the first time so I turned the TV up really loud to drown out the noise, and a minute or two later my mom comes downstairs in this skimpy nightgown to ask me why the TV was so loud and, seeing the horror on my face, kept asking what was wrong with me. FML
Today, I saw myself in a 'girls gone wild' ad with another girl. So did my mom. FML
Today, my mother threw a fit because the psychologist she got me suggested I visit a psychiatrist. Apparently, it's my fault because I "choose" to be so "crazy". FML
Today, my mother topped someone's story of their child's problems by saying I'm on drugs. This resulted in people showing up to stage an intervention for me. She made the whole thing up and I've never used drugs, but no one believes me. FML
Today, my mom decided it was a good idea to remind me about my non-existent sex life while all the family was having dinner. FML
Today, my mom tried to convince my dad that I was a lesbian. Why? Because she was bored. FML
Today, I got called into the school by my daughter's teacher. Apparently my daughter informed her class that over the weekend she spent her time with her daddy watching porn stars while her mummy was at work. It took a long time to convince her they were actually watching a TV show called "Pawn Stars". FML
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Top comments
I_Punch_Babies 7
if its on tv it must be true :-/
Meowingtons500 18
Oh boy, wait until she sees Maury.
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Comments (208)
SqueakyChipmunk 22
Or their head turns orange.
unknown_user5566 27
Well now that she already thinks you're involved in sex parties, may as well partake in the festivities!
melikeyturtles 3
Are you involved in sex parties?
melikeyturtles 3
Are you involved in sex parties?
melikeyturtles 3
Are you involved in sex parties?
hateevryone 15
Well have you ever been involved in sex parties?
perdix 31
I think the used condom hanging out of your ass might confirm the man's story.
neerf 4
Well your obviously no involved in grammar parties or you would know it's "my friends and I"
unknown_user5566 27
You're* not*, and you forgot the period at the end. Guess you missed the last few parties as well?
eyecon502 13
Tell your mom not to worry...she's invited. Mom's...if they aren't freaking out about something, they're driving you into a lake.
liketonightsky 1
So are you involved in a sex party?