Today, I had a small gathering of family and friends over to celebrate my son's baptism. One of my friends happens to be a police officer. The entire event consisted of him arresting three of my family members. Don't worry, he came back to get some cake. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, after my parents left for the weekend, my "friends" decided to throw a party at my house, despite my protests. In order to get them to leave, I called the police. I was the only one arrested, while they got warnings. FML
Today, my estranged father, who is a cop, decided to show up to my 17th birthday party. He immediately began arresting people for underage drinking. Way to mend fences, dad. FML
Today, I had my 18th birthday party. At midnight, three police officers showed up at my door and asked if they could look around. Were we doing anything bad? Nope. My friends suck at parking. Before they left, the officers said that this was the most toned down party they'd seen in years. FML
Today, my visiting cousin was driving me to pick-up and pay for my wedding cake at the bakery. The cops pulled him over for speeding and as it turns out his license was expired. I ended up having to use my wedding cake money to bail him out of jail. FML
Today, my best friend was throwing me my bachelorette partly. A cop came by and said there have been complaints about the noise. Thinking he was the stripper we ordered, we pulled him into the house. He was an actual cop. FML
Today, I had to bail my drunk husband out of jail after he and his best friend tried to steal a police horse from an officer. FML
Today, my son is such an idiot that he forgot he invited both his girlfriends to my brother's funeral. They started a punch-up over him and everyone ended up joining in since we're a very argumentative family. People got arrested and in the end both girls agreed to share my son, who was unconscious. FML
Today, my boyfriend finally met my brother. He arrested him for drunk driving. FML
Today, I had to call the police to get my crazy stalker of a neighbor out of my house. When the police arrived, I found out that she was friends with the officer. FML
Today, as I returned home, I noticed some movement inside my house. Thinking it was a break-in, I called 911. It was my friends and some coworkers trying to throw me a surprise birthday party. Nobody's said a word to me since. FML
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Top comments
allmidnighteyes 11
I don't see anything wrong with this as long as everyone got cake.
extremenoodles 0
That's what you get for combining your son's baptism with your annual underground ****-fighting night.
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Comments (127)
ashlynnb7 0
What did they get arrested for??
sweet_candy_ 17
yeah I wonder why?
PizzaGuy11 0
...?
EffinAhole 0
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Probably outstanding warrants. YDI for having family members that commit crimes.
sjess090 0
obviously fake when cops are off duty they don't arrest anyone
aardvarkish 17
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
50, more like stop associating with cops.
jok3r_l3tal 0
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
@ 65 agreed. Ydi for having such an idiotic friend that happens to be a cop O.o?
TurboTalon 0
He attended a party while on duty???
bailes_o_hay 0
89 - it's ok as long as he had less than 3 or 4 beers
cats400 16
#45 What?!? How is that OPs fault?
allmidnighteyes 11
I don't see anything wrong with this as long as everyone got cake.
Mantus 2
The cake is a lie.
dayve 0
hahaha I see what u did there
allmidnighteyes 11
Your reply was a triumph.
blankaex 0
The cake is a spy.
daltreix 3
This FML is a spah!
alstbv12 13
win.
Teckzilla 21
It's hard to overstate my satisfaction.
Tandy13 0
wow that must have been a really big incident to have 3 people arrested, but thats just weird. sorry to hear that.
justsomgirl 4
What did he arrest them for?
PizzaGuy11 0
rape.
justsomgirl 4
Wow. Good one. (That was sarcasm.) Grow up. (That wasn't.)
PizzaGuy11 0
sigh...
justsomgirl 4
I swear there was a really retarded comment there a minute ago. And then it disappeared and now it looks like I responded to myself. Twice.
PizzaGuy11 0
It's... MOVIE MAGIC!!!!!
justsomgirl 4
Alright fine. You win. Your comments are now amusing me. (That wasn't sarcasm.)
PizzaGuy11 0
phew, thank god. i was beginning to think it was gonna... RE-APPEAR...!
justsomgirl 4
Doesn't seem so.
PizzaGuy11 0
yeah, do you think we should stop responding?
justsomgirl 4
Probably. It was fun while it lasted though.
gozar_fml 1
They were arrested for double dipping in the chips and salsa bowl.
justsomgirl 4
Those animals! No wonder he arrested them. Good riddance I say!
extremenoodles 0
That's what you get for combining your son's baptism with your annual underground ****-fighting night.
roeallen 11
lol! ^.^
stewpididiot 11
**** fighting as in chickens or.........?
banananut 0
This is totally fake, everyone knows cops only eat donuts! Cops eating cake...HA. What a joke.
CoolAsian 0
win
AKBO47 0
lmfao!!!!!!!!
FarSide 23
A cop will eat a 3-foot turd if you dust it with powdered sugar.
imsoscrewd 2
No u
SAGARCo 19
It was a donut cake.
Nemesis2747 4
Some friend that is. Yea.. he isnt getting invited anywhere anymore
BrutalFbomb 5
I agree. he's definitely a dick.
tatababe 1
And what if they deserved to be arrested god knows what they could of done the cop had every right to arrest them
mitchn60 6
He wouldn't have done it if there had been doughnuts instead of cake. Now ya know.
BIGshooter 2
nice S&W M&P. .45?
mitchn60 6
Yes it is. I also have it in .40 for my duty gun.
averagesuperhero 0
Are you guys cops? Just wondering.
mitchn60 6
For some reason I can't get my answer to post, even though it says I was successful. Nope, not a cop, armed security and protection work.
chelle_starlight 0
just another day on the job...so, make sure he is not invited to your child's wedding...he could be a damper for such a joyous occassion...
spade1997 0
haha wow