Today, my 5 year old-son and I went out for a walk. As I was looking in a shop's window display, I turned around to see my son pooping into an open manhole on the street. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my 3-year-old son decided to pull down his pants and pee outside as our local city's parade had just started marching down the street. FML
Today, I was at the grocery store with my five year-old son when I had to go to the bathroom. After doing my business and we started walking out of the bathroom, my son loudly announced to the whole store, "Mommy has diarrhea!" FML
Today, I went on a walk with my family because I'm trying to be more active. We were near my son's school when I got a grumbling in my stomach. I rushed to find a place to take a dump. As I approached a Porta-Potty, my ass couldn't hold it any longer and I shit myself 20 feet away from the toilet. FML
Today, my 1-year-old son walked up to me with a disgusted look on his face. I could tell he had something in his mouth so I pulled it out. He'd been sucking on a piece of cat poop. FML
Today, my 6-year-old son pooped in the back yard and used a stick to throw it over the fence into my neighbor's yard. FML
Today, my son pooped in his diaper and managed to somehow take it off without my knowledge. He then sat down on the carpet and imitated a dog with worms, all the way down the hallway, through the living room, and into my bedroom. FML
Today, I was in a public toilet taking a dump. I then noticed someone trying to peep under the door, so I kicked them in the head as hard as I could. Turned out it was a 5-year-old looking for his parent. FML
Today, I took my son to a doctor’s appointment. As we were walking to the office, we saw a homeless man, stark naked, bathing in the decorative fountain. I hurried us inside but unfortunately my son got full view of well everything. FML
Today, I got a call from my five-year-old son's principal. My son had pooped in the schoolyard, then gave the teacher a Ziploc bag, and commanded her to pick it up. He said he was trying to imitate our dog. FML
Today, I went out on the porch to smoke a cigarette and then my two year-old son locked me out. I didn't have my cellphone so while I was waiting for my husband to get home, he pooped, smeared his poop all over the floor and glass door, then tried to "mop it." It was literally a shit show. FML
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Top comments
cdatribe23 0
hahaha sounds like my sister... she's 14.
giantsfan2010 23
I really hope you punished him for that.
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Comments (161)
Shieya 0
Let me guess, you were more worried about what people on the street were thinking about you than about the possibility of your son falling into an open manhole, right?
stephy228 0
WTF kind of mom r u? how do u take your eyes off a 5 yr old long enough 4 him 2 b in the STREET much less doing ANYTHING over a MANHOLE? FHL 4 having u for a mother!
doubleohseven 0
WTF?!?' lol how long were u looking at the window?
cherieblossom 5
wow looks like you didn't potty train your puppy very well there, maybe you should spend less time window shopping and more teaching your kid common sense...
mrbungle666 0
YDI try keeping an eye on your kid. someone could have taken him an sold him to the circus.
nerdsgetmehot 23
It's a rare FML that will make me guffaw loudly. Bravo.
b_anhero 0
manhole training ftw
vbmg152 19
YDI. FML your kid having you for a Mom. What the He** was he doing near an open manhole cover? This is sad! You should be ashamed for thinking this was funny! I hope CPS comes to visit you!!! He could have fallen in and been killed, dumba**!
IrishSoulja 4
#85 rofl the way you censor out those soft swears you are obviously some obsessive mother who wont let her children go until the age of 30
kells_bells_1 0
while we were at the zoo looking at the animals I turned around to find my son with his pants down peeing fighting the middle of the walkway.
kimmykimkim 0
you need to beat him!