Today, I went on a blind date. The guy greeted me with a "What's up, bitch?", which I wrote off as him just being really laid-back. By dessert, he'd asked me if my boobs are real, then when we finished, asked how many more dates it'd take before I put out. So much for that. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I went on a blind date. When I arrived, the guy looked nothing like his profile picture. We started chatting, and things were going fine until he asked, “So, what do you think about my date?” I replied, “Uh, I think it’s going well!” He responded, “I was talking about the waitress. I’m married.” FML
Today, I went on a blind date at a restaurant. My date took one look at me and said pityingly, "Stuffed your bra, didn't ya? Seriously, why even bother?" The douche then started trying to lecture me on "false advertising". FML
Today, I went on a blind date. All my date would talk about was how he was 'really his own best friend'. FML
Today, I went on a blind date. All my date would talk about was how he was "really his own best friend." FML
Today, I went on a blind date. Not only I had already been on a date with the guy before, we'd also had both forgotten about it until halfway through the dinner. FML
Today, I went on a blind date. He took one look at me and said, "Well, we might as well get a drink anyway." FML
Today, I went on a blind date. Sadly, I wasn't blind enough. FML
Today, I went on a blind date. My date spent the whole time at the restaurant on his phone and didn't even try to show interest. Thankfully I'll never have to deal with this individual ever again. FML
Today, I went on a blind date, even though the whole concept freaks me out a bit. My date showed up with his sister, who sat at our table and critiqued everything we did, from how I chewed my food, to the way we nervously laughed. He hardly said a word the whole time. FML
Today, I went on a blind date. At the end of the night, I told him I had a surprisingly great time. He replied, "Yeah, that was fun. You're really funny and smart. If you were pretty, I'd totally go out with you again." FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
Blue_Black_fml 21
I would have wrote HIM off after that "what's up bitch"! It's rude, not laid-back..
lyssgross 16
Oh, the guys that think they're so gangsta. FYL, OP.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (143)
HumanWiki 8
Well? Are they real?
yourmurderscenex 13
here's some tough love for you. if you think a guy that refers to you as a bitch is laid back then you need some serious help with your self esteem. no one male or female should be disrespected like that in any way. you should have turned around and walked away. stand up for yourself!
klong91 7
I would have written him off the second he said "what's up bitch"
Lovely_Lex92 3
YDI. I'm sorry, but I don't let anyone speak to me that way.. friends, first dates, it doesn't matter. Better luck with the next one. :)
baref00tmama 15
YDI for sticking around after "what's up, bitch". I mean, come on. Clearly he's a douche.
Xotoolyxo 16
Props to you for sticking it out fot that long
courtz94 24
If a date said "what's up bitch?" To me as a greeting, I'd turn around and walk away. That's not laid back, that's rude.
fishee_fishee 3
Seriously?! This is how women end up in abusive relationships! Man up and have some confidence in yourself - no one deserves to be treated that way!
justmeCee 16
Wow...What a complete Dirtbag! Sorry to hear you had to go through that Op. I'd tell your 'friend' that set you up on this blind date so they can be warned not to set him up with anyone else.
peruchamami 5
as soon as he said "what's up bitch" I would of said "nothing now hoe" and walked away. men like that are NOT worth your time