Today, I went on a blind date. He took one look at me and said, "Well, we might as well get a drink anyway." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I went on a blind date. Sadly, I wasn't blind enough. FML
Today, I went on a blind date at a local restaurant. When my date walked in, she took one look at me, said "Nope", and walked out. FML
Today, I went on a blind date. As soon as my date saw me walking towards him, he checked his watch and said, "Oops, wrong place." Then walked right past me. FML
Today, I went on a blind date. Not only I had already been on a date with the guy before, we'd also had both forgotten about it until halfway through the dinner. FML
Today, I went on a blind date. Not only did his phone go flat before I found him, but we were at totally different bars. FML
Today, I went on a blind date. At the end of the night, I told him I had a surprisingly great time. He replied, "Yeah, that was fun. You're really funny and smart. If you were pretty, I'd totally go out with you again." FML
Today, I went on a blind date. When I arrived, the guy looked nothing like his profile picture. We started chatting, and things were going fine until he asked, “So, what do you think about my date?” I replied, “Uh, I think it’s going well!” He responded, “I was talking about the waitress. I’m married.” FML
Today, I met up on a blind date. He took a phone call one drink in and said he had to leave because he didn't know it was his buddy's birthday, and they were having a party without him. I offered to split the bill and put out a $20. He got up, unlocked the bicycle behind us and rode off. FML
Today, I went on a blind double date. My date was drunk before I got there. He kept getting my name wrong, and ended up spilling a glass of red wine down the front of my dress. FML
Today, I went on a blind date and mistook someone else at the restaurant for my date. We had a great conversation… until the real blind date arrived. The look on both their faces was priceless. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
Doortje 30
Throw the drink in his face. What a rude prick.
torbey 23
What a dick, I hope you refused his 'kind offer.'
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (59)
Doortje 30
Throw the drink in his face. What a rude prick.
sens3sfailing 25
Anybody who would judge if they want to be with a person off of a single glance is too superficial to possibly be worth the time. I actually hope you gave him a good time that night and made him like you then when he asks when he can see you again, look him up and down and ask why you would ever want to go out with a shallow prick like him.
CaptainDoorknob 7
Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. Sucks for OP that the beholder is a dickwad.
Feared 9
Appearance isn't everything, but it is important. He could have kept that comment to himself though.
MDTeddy 13
There is a limit to how ugly you can be so try not to go that far. Have someone try and help you prepare for a date and not to ask someone who would say that you look good even though you don't just to make you feel better.
Sandman366 6
Drink a lot, get him embarrassed, and make him pay the bill. Order one that you buy yourself and pour it on him just before you leave. If he tries to drive himself home, maybe call him in as a DUI.
torbey 23
What a dick, I hope you refused his 'kind offer.'
TurtleSmile 14
Beauty is only a light-switch away. Or at the bottom of the bottle.
boofgall 16
Maybe it's to ease the tension of just meeting.
_wraith 15
OP I hope you didn't stick around. Have more self-respect than that, for sure. No one deserves that kind of d-baggery.
Hiimhaileypotter 53
You should've left, you don't need to put up with that dick.
gc327072 31
Yea really. You know what they say about dicks, they're hard to handle.
DobGriffen 8
Go post his number on Craigslist under every category you feel suitable.
pregnantpianist 2
WIN
IscoreOnU 19
Well better get it over fast than sit through it right? If he's that d baggy at least
olpally 33
Asshole, assholes everywhere. Sounds like something Quagmire would say, what a dick-duesche.
Pretty_Pink_Lady 10
Why are people still spelling douche like that?
olpally 33
I didn't think about that, there's no auto-correct for it... Lol. I apologize.
Boob_fml 6
I did not thumb you down due to misspelling douche, but because 9 out of 10 comments you make contain the words "asshole" and "Quagmire". Ok bye.
olpally 33
Thank you for putting me down 27... I feel super awesome now. :/ goodbye!
CyborgBanana 12
27 - 'Asshole?' Giggity.
nonnieluv 9
27- your name is boob, enough said
Dixbfloppin 11
I kind of like the way he spelled "douche". It sounds exotic.
pregnantpianist 2
Yay for Quagmire!
ljord2n 4
Too bad he wasn't blind. Lol Jk, he just can't appreciate a beauty I'm sure, should've just chucked a drink in his face.
gracehi 33
"Well we might as well get a drink anyway." "Sure." *OP and guy start walking. OP sticks her leg out and trips the douche bag who falls flat on his face.* I hour that's how it went down.