Anonymous
Australia 🌶️ Spicy
Nasty
Today, I got my first hand job. I started bleeding. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Anonymous
🌶️ Spicy
Traumatized knob
Today, I got my first handjob. I also found out today that a girl can pull your skin hard enough to cause it to bleed profusely. FML
southernluxe
United States 🌶️ Spicy
Today, I got my first handjob. She ripped out a pube. It hurt so bad my eyes teared up. She asked what was wrong and not wanting to make her feel guilty I had to tell her it was "Just so good." FML
JoshuasGirl
Grand Rapids, United States 🌶️ Spicy
Today, I had sex with my boyfriend for the first time. After he'd repeatedly told me not to worry about bleeding, and reassuring me that he'd take care of me, he passed out halfway through. FML
Anonymous
🌶️ Spicy
Frustrated wank
Today, I gave my boyfriend a handjob for the first time. Apparently, I was so bad at it that he eventually just slapped my hand away and angrily said he'd do it himself. FML
Rumpkis
United States 🌶️ Spicy
Today, I almost got a blowjob for the first time. Except I came before I even got in her mouth. FML
anonymous
San Francisco, United States 🌶️ Spicy
Today, was the first time giving head to my boyfriend. He couldn't finish, so I tried a handjob. In the end he kind of pushed my hand away so he could finish himself off. FML
nnniii
Seattle, United States 🌶️ Spicy
She's electric
Today, I tried to give my first hand-job while wearing fuzzy socks in a carpeted room. I reached out to touch his dick and shocked him. FML
bloody good time
🌶️ Spicy
Nosebleed
Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend, and he slid his hand up near my face too fast and ended up clocking me in the nose. It is the first time that I've ever had nosebleed while orgasming. FML
Anonymous
Grand Rapids, United States
Today, I ran a hand down my freshly shaven leg to appreciate the smoothness, only to come up with a hand covered in blood. FML
Anonymous
Rosetown, Canada 🌶️ Spicy
Congrats
Today, after making love to my boyfriend for the first time, he shook my hand and said, "Good job." FML
Top comments
AsainChick 0
You shoul probably get that checked out...
saIty 17
That's when you know your pleaser is giving 120%.
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Comments (209)
fromthesuck 8
Sand paper... for his pleasure
vhillsflove 0
You were probably too chapped from touching yourself... YDI.
tencentsakiss 19
If you are female, this is actually pretty normal. Things can tear pretty easily down there, especially the hymen. I've heard of this happening quite a lot. If you're male, you may want to get that checked out.
tencentsakiss 19
Ok the app was being glitchy, OP is a male, oops.
The_Great_Zucchi 15
Here it comes: YOU'RE DOING IT WRONG!
Trainspotting_fml 9
Am I the only person who thought, "That's a bloody ****-up." ?
vampire1618 5
I feel bad for laughing but two of my friends who are dating, the dudes afraid his gf will "brake it" or in case of a bj "bite it off by accident". I've given my ex hand-jobs and nothing bad happened to him haha.
vampire1618 5
*break I'm ashamed of that mistake.
anndiwhite 0
Hahaaha oh that's funny shit.
trskln 1
You know, of course, that "jerked off" is simply a figure of speech, right ???
krackednyc 0
Wow...sucks 2 b u
stallion2521 0
That's not cool when she pops your cherry before you pop hers