Today, my husband wanted me to take a sleeping pill before having sex with me. Apparently I'm better in bed while half-asleep. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, while having sex with my husband, he went soft. When I asked him what happened he said, "I'm about to fall asleep." He then plopped down on my chest and began to snore. FML
Today, my husband took a pill to make him last longer in bed. He did last longer. He went from 5 minutes to 7. FML
Today, I slipped on some ice and wrecked my back. When my husband and I went to go to bed, he begged me to take one of the pain pills left over from his recent surgery. Not so I could feel better and get some rest, but so he could have sex. FML
Today, I found out why I can't sleep at night. My wife switched my sleep aid pills with energy pills. FML
Today, my boyfriend fell asleep while still giving me oral sex. FML
Today, my husband woke up in the middle of the night feeling frisky. He woke me up, got me all hot and ready to go, then before I could get into position he fell back to sleep, leaving me to fend for myself. FML
Today, I wanted to have sex with my boyfriend, but he kept falling asleep while I was giving him a handjob. Ugh, no sex. FML
Today, I was finally having sex with the man of my dreams, and then he fell asleep on top of me. FML
Today, I was half asleep and tried to cuddle my husband as we slept. Still dreaming, he yelled for me to leave his money alone. FML
Today, our daughter fell asleep early, so my husband and I decided to get frisky. He passed out mid-blow job. FML
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Top comments
drakem 7
Maybe he's just into unconscious sex.
billiejoeinabox 7
Pretty sure unconscious sex is rape...
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Comments (100)
drakem 7
Maybe he's just into unconscious sex.
Soviet_American 29
I guess so..
HersheySquirts 17
It's simple, She is so good in bed that he is scared to sleep with her while she is clear headed. He is scared to leave her unsatisfied.
billiejoeinabox 7
Pretty sure unconscious sex is rape...
Hopein2025 14
Pretend to take it. Then in the middle of sex wake up and scare him
businessleader_fml 5
He's into sleepyhead, apparently :D
tanekdrachonae 19
Rape fantasy much? OP think about it, you wake up with your husband in you... Could be interesting.
Saikon1357 25
You'd be surprised on how many women are into that.
Greenbear118 5
No rape is when one person doesn't consent
incoherentrmblr 22
Once dated a girl that wanted to be choked and had a Rape-ish fantasy. To each their own I guess...
cryssycakesx3 23
it's not rape if she doesn't say no!
BubbleGrunge 18
Damn, I'm sorry to be the party pooper here, but you do know unconscious sex can still be considered rape? If she can't physically say no, that doesn't mean yes.
Melix 31
I'd be worried
billiejoeinabox 7
#49, that's legitimately a scary thing to say. If one can't consent, it's not a no but definitely not a yes. If a victim has tape over their mouth they can't say no either, that doesn't mean they gave consent because they didn't say no.
1two3four5six 23
It's called somnophilia, and it's not rape if both parties discuss it and say it's okay beforehand.
drunkmunkey 24
or maybe OP is that bad when awake... fyl OP but on the bright side they make a pill (and probably an app) for that
JBChristian 47
What do apps have to do with anything? Bad quote.
sjbartholome 14
#26, pretty sure your comment is irrelevant.
Zebediabolical 45
I once dated a girl a couple times. When it came third date fooing around time, she flat out told me. 'Zeb, I won't have sex with you. But I'll help you drug me.' Not /let/ but /help/. I supplied the cash, she got the rohypnol. I thought a lot about that over the years. And as near as I can understand, she was raised in a very strict household and basically told that enjoying sex was bad. But if she's not in her right mind, she can enjoy herself and blame it on the Rope. At least that's what made sense to me.
incoherentrmblr 22
#57, why be worried, you're a Doctor...
GOtllt 17
Keep your head up OP, sex isn't that a life-or-death skill. Hopefully your husband apologizes.
tomwantssnow 14
Well, it is kinda a "life" skill as it does help produce life
cryssycakesx3 23
there's no reason for him to apologize for something he enjoys, no matter how creepy, weird, freaky, or unorthodox even, it may be.
JBChristian 47
I beg to differ. There's people that like to murder. I sure would expect them to be served justice whether they like it or not.
xxrogerthatxx 19
I'm actually with 51 here. Why apologize for your fetish? At least he's not a necrophiliac
dDailydDosage 8
He shouldn't apologize for what he said. Maybe apologize for saying it or how he said it because she rightfully would be offended. BUT He was being honest and OP should appreciate that. If anything maybe OP and her husband can now talk about improving their sex life without her having to take pills.
amicusbriefs 10
Maybe he wants you to think it's better, and it's harder to judge when you're half asleep.
ifoundalaska 11
Honestly, he's probably better in her sleep as well
Wizardo 34
He wanted you as limp as he gets when you're awake...
Kyle1dc 17
Having sex with her while she's asleep is probably a dream cum true for him.
Fritterzz 13
I bet he has a noodle fetish.
MisterEx 28
Maybe he just can't keep up with your pace anymore. Turtle sex syndrome.
cryssycakesx3 23
lol, oh the tortoise and hare...
Drizl 17
Just tell him that he doesn't need to have sex anymore then.
PenguinBitch 44
Guess he wants to do all the work.
ryan1268 18
Maybe you over think? Or you get nervouse or you are too quick i don't know but i don't think it's a bad thing.
JBChristian 47
Whatever it is, it should be talked about. Communication is the key to great relationships.
martin8337 36
At least he isn't slipping you roofies.
chosha_fml 27
No, he wants her to do it for him.
donkinator 24
maybe your subconcious is more into sex than you are when you're awake?