Today, the car in front of me in the drop-off area at my son's school parked, and the driver got out. I basically leaned on my horn and gave her every dirty look in the book. She said nothing but stared at me as she opened the back of her van to unload her child's wheelchair. I'm an asshole. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was sitting in a parked car. A woman was having difficulties maneuvering out. She honked the horn repeatedly for me to move, then looked me in the eye and called me a "f**king bitch", before driving off. I was in the passenger seat. FML
Today, I noticed a flashy car badly parking itself in a handicapped space. I hate the asshats who do this, so I went up to berate the driver. After an opening salvo of coarse language, a glint of light on his wheelchair in the back caught my eye. I then had to apologise for being a shitehawk. FML
Today, as I was getting out of my car, an old and obese lady walked up to me and called me an "inconsiderate heartless bitch" for using the last handicap parking spot. I guess she didn't see my wheelchair. FML
Today, while leaving work, I noticed a woman struggling with her wheelchair. Trying to be kind, I grabbed the handles and began to push her. A few moments later, the front wheels caught on something and I ended up dumping her onto the ground. Now my coworkers all think I'm a huge douche. FML
Today, I saw a woman still texting on her phone as she started to drive away when the light turned green. I made sure to stare her down and give her a dirty look because she wasn't paying attention to driving. She laughed as I rear-ended the car in front of me. FML
Today, I parked in a disabled bay so I could drop my son off at his appointment. My son uses crutches and has a blue badge. As I was trying to leave, an absolute Karen started chewing my ass for using a disabled bay while “not looking disabled”, then lay under my wheels to stop me leaving. FML
Today, I parked in a "Disabled" space. A woman and her kids comes yelling at me about how I don't look disabled and I was just being selfish. I roll my pants up to reveal two prosthetic legs. She then yells at me that I should have warned her before showing my legs since it could scare her kids. FML
Today, after parking in the handicapped spot of a lot with my placard, an older couple with their 7-year-old grandchild came up and yelled at me for being a lying asshole and taking the parking spot. When I showed them my prosthetic leg, the kid started crying and guess who got yelled at again. FML
Today, I was driving to work when I was almost hit by a teenage driver. I gave her the finger and shouted "F*** you!" making sure that she heard me. I then saw my boss glaring at me from the passenger seat. FML
Today, the last parking space outside my work was tiny but I tried to parallel park there in desperation. A school kid saw the whole attempt and sarcastically clapped me as I gave up and drove away. FML
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Top comments
unhappybitch 8
At least you admit it.
Baconman345 9
Mom of the year
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Comments (208)
BingleBop 18
To be fair, she should by law have had a sticker on her van, and should have let you go past first. But yeah, honking continuously was probably NOT the best idea.
skillkill 2
Ydi got being an impatient biatch! But but sux cause you didn't realize why they stopped
ilovenoahvanway 2
Wow. That's ****** up
n1988e 8
YDI
wellthatsukx 0
Didn't they have the decency to put a handicap placard on the back?
DoxIxHAVExTo 10
Is it just me, or does anyone else imagine the woman's face to look like Haunter from the "Haunter used Mean Look!" meme? Just me? Okay.
krs7g4 8
You probably should have gotten out and helped.
TwentyFourXXIV 13
At least you admitted it XD
TheChillyBoy88 6
Welcome to FML, where the faintest shade of optimism and positivity is frowned upon with a crushing force of 20,000 heartless people. Enjoy your stay!
hahahayeahnope 3
Knowing you're an asshole is the first step toward not being one. I'll bet you won't be quite so quick to make a snap judgement next time, will you? No, no you won't. And that's a GOOD thing. Congratulations on your first step toward a brighter future.