Today, I went with my girlfriend to her parents' house. They told me I smelled of cheap vodka. When I told them I worked in a bio lab and used ethanol a lot, they said I was too stupid to do anything like that. My girlfriend broke up with me because her parents think I'm a drunk. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I met my girlfriend's mom. She went on about how my girlfriend's dad is a no good drunk, following this statement with spilling her fifth glass of wine. FML
Today, my girlfriend came over, drank half a bottle of Jack Daniels and pissed in my sink. I broke up with her and went out with friends. I met a woman and brought her home to watch a movie. She drank a bottle of wine and puked on my couch. FML
Today, my boyfriend introduced me to his family. They were drinking and having fun, so I joined in. I had one too many, got really goofy, and then suggested the farting game. "Sorry, I can't hold my liquor!" I quickly explained. My boyfriend's mom shot me a cold look and said, "It's non-alcoholic." FML
Today, I found out the reason my boyfriend dumped me was because his parents don't like the fact that I go to a prestigious university. However, they're completely accepting of the drunken slob who's dating their daughter. FML
Today, my parents lectured me about how my girlfriend will ruin my life, because she's a single mom, a recovering alcoholic, and has chronic health issues. Apparently, I should be with their friend's rude, trashy daughter, who can't keep a job, and goes on a drunken, drug-fueled bender every other week. I'm 31. FML
Today, it's been 2 weeks since I took my girlfriend to meet my friends, and they made her play a drinking game. A question she had to answer was about me and how she liked my hygiene, because her ex had terrible hygiene and never wiped his ass. Today she dumped me for him, so now to my friends I'm the guy who is lower than the skidmarks guy. FML
Today, at dinner, I accidentally let it slip that I'd taken a small sip of alcohol a few years ago and hated it. My extremely strict parents are now trying to get me into rehab. FML
Today, my girlfriend's overprotective parents decided that I'm a bad influence on their daughter. I'm a straight A engineering student who openly speaks out against drugs, alcohol, and discrimination. Their reason? Someone told them I dyed my hair black. They think I'm a "closet Nazi". FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were visiting his parents. When we got there, I hugged his mother, and she glared at me. Later that day, I heard her telling her son that he should leave me because I smell like cigarettes, and she hates smokers. I don't smoke, my boyfriend does. He did all the way there. FML
Today, I met my girlfriend's parents. Her father looked me up and down, said, “No” then went back to his TV. My girlfriend immediately broke up with me and threw me out. I even had to get a really expensive taxi home, because we’d driven in her car and I had no idea what part of the city I was in. FML
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Top comments
airbornerose 0
Wow. Sounds like the girlfriend is the idiot.
null_fml 11
I think there's more to this story than a 300-character-limit allows. (or whatever number it actually is)
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Comments (90)
alsgirl 24
Stupid gf
The_9th_Doctor 18
burn the house down and walk away
sdroze1389 31
the question...are you?
hggtre 15
Sounds like stupid birches to me
cwl727 33
Your girlfriend is an idiot for believing her parents and not you.
Lunasis 14
good riddance I say, don't worry you'll find someone with a brain
Shikonphoenix_fml 12
I work in a lab with alcohol, I totally understand, how closed minded.
slimashli 7
well the parent's are idiots cause vodka smells very different than ethanol and the girl was a moron for breaking up with over something she knows wasn't even true
Samba1234 13
If your girlfriend loves you that little its better this way
Hangryko 32
You dodged a bullet, you don't those idiots as your future in-laws and wife.