Today, I went to the doctor for a physical. I've been sitting in the doctor's bathroom for 10 minutes now, trying to think of how to tell him I accidentally tripped and spilled my urine sample on the carpet. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I had to go to the clinic for a physical. The nurse asked me for a pee sample; however, I had no urine to give. After 20 minutes of standing at the stall I was able to squeeze half a cup of pee. As I approached the sink to cover the sample, I somehow managed to drop it all over myself. FML
Today, I spent two hours trying to catch a urine sample whilst at urgent care due to my inability to pee in public restrooms. I finally managed one, and was so excited by my success that I fumbled it and spilled it on my pants. FML
Today, I had to get a urine analysis done for my doctor. I take medicine that makes me a little shaky sometimes. Guess who spilled their pee all over themselves while trying to put the lid on. FML
Today, I went to get blood and urine tests done before work. As I was attempting to aim into the cup, I lost balance and slipped. I ended up peeing on my sleeves and my pants. I was late for work and I smelled like pee. FML
Today, I dropped my urine sample on my pants. Not only do I now not have a sample, it looks like I pissed myself. FML
Today, I went in for an interview. While I was waiting to be called, I used the restroom. When I stood up to wipe, I slipped on the floor and fell ass first into the unflushed toilet. I was found an hour later, covered in my own shit and too injured to move. FML
Today, I had to take a drug test for a new job. I ended up spilling the cup of piss all over myself. I had to explain what had happened, then go sit in a waiting room full of disgusted-looking people, while I kept drinking water to fill my bladder back up. FML
Today, I had to take a urine test. I drank a lot of water so that I wouldn't force it. When I got there, I had to pee really bad. The cup was too small and when I relieved my bladder, it was a jet that rebounded off of the cup and overflowed going all over my hands, clothes, toilet, and floor. FML
Today, I was holding in pee because i was so busy at work. When I finally got up to relieve myself, I pulled down my pants, sneezed at that exact moment and peed all over the bathroom floor. FML
Today, I was in a public bathroom, when a little boy walked in and he had an 'accident'. He asked if I could help him clean it up, so I decided to help. I started to walk to him to assist him. That's when I walked straight into the pee and slipped. My whole back was covered in pee. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
that1guy1 13
I would start with that. " I tripped and spilled my urine sample," seems to work well.
SwedishDerp 3
"Here's your urine sample" *hands over carpet*
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (142)
that1guy1 13
I would start with that. " I tripped and spilled my urine sample," seems to work well.
theghost1309 11
Lol I was thinking the same thing.
enonymous 9
Fill the cup with poo and say thats what he asked for originally
airforce987 20
Since when do people take urine samples at a physical? I get one every year and I've never had to provide a urine sample.
Fruit_Dealer 9
Its not that hard : "Whats up doc, have you seen my urine?" Being a doctor I think I would be amused. Ok I lied I'm not a doctor.
rexgar2000 10
damn dude.. handle that shit with care OP. I would be slightly upset if that was my carpet
karmaslave 5
14- It's common if you are on medications since some side effects show in the urine. We also don't know if the OP had some other reason for needing that checked.
Kiirst_mt1994 26
just tell the doctor straight, no harm in that.
nohugs4u 8
No because that would be common sense
LePwnapple 0
Black People...
Lanceeden 12
WTF 35?!
Emoney1 3
U need a better doctor
Spoonz 4
Piss happens
rallets 23
looks like urine trouble
systemofadown11 8
I hate when things like that happen lol!
SystemofaBlink41 27
I bet the doctor got pissed off!
angrymexican 8
Tell him you got thirsty
hellbilly205 17
This isnt really an fml, like really im sure this shit happens at the doctors office all the time...
Drummerboy1234 0
Hey doc, urine need of a new carpet!
13kellyleigh 4
Nice 117- that actually made me laugh :)
YoTengoTomatoes 7
I dropped my urine sample on the ground one time when I was around 7. Just go tell the doctor you dropped it. They don't even need it because it only says if you have diabetes or something (don't really remember it since I was 7..) but yea op u don't need to worry the pee sample isn't the main reason you're at the doctor hopefully
gojira666 7
A lot of pre-employment physicals require blood and/or urine samples
doggiemcwoofwoof 2
At least it's easy to prove just tell him to smell here lol
AlwaysCracked 6
Why would he not believe you tripped and spilt urine? Does he have trust issues?
zolziski 11
Maybe the urine sample was for a drug test.
bitchslapped22 14
If it was for a drug test it could easily be thought as an excuse in the doctor's perspective. But seeing as it's a physical like she said, I think she's just embarressed.
IndiRae 9
Who the **** carpets a bathroom? That's about as useful as **** on a turtle.
satph 12
48- LOL!!!
LilTiki559 13
108- LOL!!! !
kitsune3 20
Try reading, dude. It says OP's a man.
EmAnRap 2
Try to pee again
qwert1994 0
That's why they don't use carpet in bathrooms.
SwedishDerp 3
"Here's your urine sample" *hands over carpet*
Daralea 21
Or cut out carpet section, squeeze it over the urine sample container, hand over to doc, get sent to the hospital for peeing out dust mites.
lakaiskate 12
I don't understand why there is carpet in a bathroom.
HomeAl0ne 20
To soak up all the spilled urine I guess.
DgLaw9 0
Who puts carpet in the bathroom? Your doctor is an idiot.
Flyersfan54 4
It doesn't say he tripped in the bathroom..
qwert1994 0
16- Seeing how bathrooms are where you pee, she was still in there thinking for an excuse.
_cassandra__fml 4
#5 is right. Doctor's offices really shouldn't have any carpets, seeing as how many sick people come through there. Chances are that a lot more "accidents" happen in there - people bleeding, throwing up, having diarrhea... Heck, if people bring along their sick kids because the whole family is suffering from mystery flu, the kids will be crawling through a carpet of germs and nastiness...
PremierWu1 7
Looks like urine trouble...
13FTW 9
I'd be pissed if that happened to me.
tellithowitis 13
I see what you did there! #punny
rallets 23
stole my line :/
alexchiltonLC 7
It's not your line
False_Stupidity 42
Are you sure? Well who's line is it anyway?
CHOMP3R 0
Just say it. He's a doctor... He's probably heard it at least once.
airthunder12 1
I agree chomp3r
CHOMP3R 0
Just say it. He's a doctor... He's probably heard it at least once.
JHandAC 4
Okay, here's the plan: Grab a heavy, blunt object. Smack a hole in the wall. Throw the sample cup on the ground. When the doctor comes in tell him that a giant *insert word here* crashed through the wall, threw your urine sample on the ground, and left. If he doesn't believe you, run through the hole. It's FOOLPROOF!
Emoney1 3
A Giant Kool-Aid Man! "I spilt your piss, Oh Yeah!!!!"
eaglesfootball 1
59 that's hilarious, touché
tucker5005 1
I like the plan B for if he doesn't believe you.
hinchkongfang 0
59 wins!!
LilTiki559 13
121's! picture WiNs!xD.
VaanBasch 1
Try using words.