Today, it was our 5th anniversary, so I decided to play a little joke on my girlfriend. Before I gave her the real present, an engagement ring, I gave her a gift-wrapped rolling pin instead. I ended up in the hospital. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I proposed to my girlfriend, only for her to slap me, throwing the "fake ring" away and storming off, convinced it was a cruel joke. FML
Today, I was going to propose to my girlfriend of 4 years. I took the whole day to cook a nice meal, and stuck the ring in a cookie that I was going to give to her. In the middle of the dinner I was holding the cookie under the table, about to give it to her. My dog ate it. FML
Today, I proposed to my girlfriend with a ring from Kay Jewelers. She saw the box, started giggling, whispered, "'Kay", and then started laughing so hard at her joke she had to excuse herself. FML
Today, my wife figured out I gave her a dollar store ring for our anniversary. FML
Today, I took my girlfriend out for dinner to a fancy Italian restaurant for our one year anniversary. After giving her some roses, freshly baked cookies, and a thoughtful poem I wrote for her, she started laughing and asked for her real gift. FML
Today, I was going to propose to my girlfriend. I had been hiding the ring in the sock drawer. When I went to retrieve it, the ring was gone and in its place was a sticky note that said "NO." FML
Today, my girlfriend decided it would be hilarious if she pulled a prank on me, so she did the classic "bucket of water on a door" one. I ended up getting stitches and a concussion on my birthday. FML
Today, it's my birthday. My girlfriend gave me the present she'd bought for me. I said, joking, "I hope it's not a tie!" It was a tie. FML
Today, as a 1 year anniversary present, my boyfriend let me see and wear my engagement ring. He then made me give it back at the end of the day. FML
Today, I planned to propose to my girlfriend in front of her family at dinner. I had the ring ready and got down on one knee. She immediately burst into laughter and said, "Are you kidding?" The family stared in silence, and I quickly realised she was just teasing me... until I stood up and knocked over an entire table of drinks. FML
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Top comments
PixelNoob 11
It seems like after five years, she'd know you well enough to recognize that it was a gag gift. Unless you've just told her to get back in the kitchen one too many times and she finally snapped...
mk58 31
Let me guess, she made you shove it up your ass.
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Comments (204)
storyofthemonth 0
Happy anniversary? Also, why does it say "and engagement ring?"
BadReputation 0
-facepalm-
ceddyz17 10
Well they kinda go together
ripgeorgecarl1n 7
No cooking? No jewelry. XD
LePwnapple 0
You let a woman beat you up? Pathetic, show her who's boss, domestic abuse FTW
Levvy 22
Yes, Pwnapple. I am sure he, like everyone who is a victim of violence, was only hospitalized because he chose to be. And if anyone ever hurts you, you better not complain, because that means you chose it too.
LouisianaBob 9
Don't worry OP your concussion got a laugh out of me
yoursucklives 36
i'm prepared for negative thumbs, so i'm just gonna say it: i'm from austria too and i love reading fmls from where i live. and i think it's funny what you did. but if i was your girlfriend i wouldn't be too amused either!
yasmineo16 0
Don't mess with the ladies!
ohSNAPyall 27
No jewelry? No cooking.
rcbarnes 24
...and concussions, too. :-P
BadReputation 0
Pwnd.
That0therguy 4
No.
franniedottp 8
Only if it was a headshot.
skullcandifiedDJ 5
you should've got her some chill pills instead...
mk58 31
Let me guess, she made you shove it up your ass.
IntoTheClouds 42
The way I saw it in moderation is that he had a black eye and a broken nose, or something along those lines.
Braginskyyy 6
It's amazing how reading one comment can probably give you horrible nightmares for weeks.
Daralea 21
Good news! OP now has store credit at an expensive jewelry store. Bad news: there is no return policy for those 5 years.
Eggers 2
are you new to the internet 51?
mk58 31
51, I'm guessing you haven't heard about DocBastard's patient who had a coke bottle stuck up there.
DreBeezy 9
Lol your picture totally goes with your comment.
storyofthemonth 0
Wow, it said "and engagement ring" and my comment about it got deleted :/
laden_swallow09 35
Giving her a weapon for a gift… How else didja think it was going to end up? lols
pitchblease 2
That's why she didn't get a waffle iron!
RedPillSucks 33
Brilliant gift idea #47 "Honey, go in the kitchen and make me a samich for our anniversary. By the way, I left you a loaded gun as an anniversary gift. Where the @&%$! is my samich??!!"
artprincess 0
love ur pic
PixelNoob 11
It seems like after five years, she'd know you well enough to recognize that it was a gag gift. Unless you've just told her to get back in the kitchen one too many times and she finally snapped...
Crlnprz 11
No you guys, obviously she used the ring as a weapon. Duh
malfoyfreak 3
Well played.
jeremy0690 0
haha
Sonic_boomerang 5
Little bit abusive, you sure you wanna get into that?
TXjuggalo972 6
Well physco in the head, good in bed... So I'd get in that
enonymous 9
You had me at 'bitch go make me a pie'