Today, my friends told me that my girlfriend of over a year and a half refers to me on Facebook, Twitter and Snapchat as "the monster I can't get rid of." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my girlfriend got a Twitter account. Now she won't stop hashtagging everything she sends me. FML
Today, I discovered that my best friend of 3 years has me in her phone as "Stupid Bitch". FML
Today, my now ex-girlfriend posted on Facebook that I called her a "fucking bitch". Our mutual friends were all outraged, and demanded that I treat her with respect. What she failed to mention was that I said it after finding out that she's been sleeping with my "best friend" for the past year. FML
Today, my girlfriend threatened to break up with me because I don't like her Facebook statuses enough. FML
Today, I was introduced to friends of my boyfriend as, "My other girlfriend." FML
Today, a girl who has had a problem with me for as long as I can remember, tagged me in a Facebook status update in which she equated my intelligence to that of a mollusk and equated my weight to that of a hippopotamus. My boyfriend, as well as several of my "friends," liked it. FML
Today, I found out my girlfriend talks to around 18 other men for fun. She says she loves me more, but I told her to prove it, so I took her phone and deleted the social media accounts that she made just for these men. Now I'm a "toxic controlling monster" because I don't let her chat with random men. FML
Today, my girlfriend got into my Facebook account and changed our relationship status to single, just to see which of my friends would "like" it. After revealing to me what she did, she now says I can no longer be friends with anyone who liked it. FML
Today, I stumbled upon my girlfriend's Twitter account that I didn't know existed. A recent entry states that living with me is pathetic; "it's just that the current economical situation doesn't leave her with many options." FML
Today, I've been calling my girlfriend by her nickname for so long, I had to reactivate my Facebook account to find her real name. FML
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Top comments
deadvacum 10
Re-evaluate the situation, and if she’s the abusive one, call her out!
diraven 15
Maybe she's talking about the size of your dick
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Comments (4)
RichardPencil 32
Maybe you ought to take her internet privileges away. The nerve! After all you do for her! I'm sure the basement you have her chained up in is very comfortable.
deadvacum 10
Re-evaluate the situation, and if she’s the abusive one, call her out!
diraven 15
Maybe she's talking about the size of your dick
JasonThorn 23
Sounds like someone needs to be proven right... Get rid of HER first.