Today, I decided to put on some sexy lingerie and wait for my husband to come home to surprise him. He took one look at me and immediately accused me of cheating. He was convinced my explanation was a lie and that I'd rushed some guy out the back door when he came home. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I wanted to surprise my boyfriend by dressing up in sexy lingerie. When I went to answer the door he was standing there with a shocked expression, his friends parked in the driveway had the same expression as well. He came to break up with me. He told me after we had sex. FML
Today, I tried to surprise my husband by wearing something sexy to bed. He didn't say anything, just laughed and left the room for 10 minutes. The little confidence I had disappeared, so I changed, feeling stupid for thinking I could pull off sexy. He got mad at me for being confusing. FML
Today, I dressed cute to surprise my boyfriend of 2 years. Instead of being happy or impressed about it, he accused me of cheating and dressing up to impress a new guy he'd made up in his head. FML
Today, I left the house for a while and when I came back my husband was wearing my lacy lingerie. He looks better in it than I do. FML
Today, while heading to the bathroom, I saw my girlfriend putting some lingerie under my bed. I stupidly thought it was for some sexy time later. Well, later on, she dramatically "found" the lingerie and broke up with me. Almost everyone believes her story and thinks I'm a dirty cheater. FML
Today, I decided to go home and apologise to my husband for accusing him of having an affair. I came home to find him having sex with my mother. FML
Today, I put on some sexy lingerie, ready to have some fun with my husband. I found him in the living room, opening a bag of Doritos in front of the TV. He saw me and understood. Then he looked back at the Doritos, then back at me and said gravely, "No way, babe. No way." FML
Today, I felt like spicing up our marriage, so I thought I'd surprise my husband when he got home from work. I put on my sexiest teddy, lit some candles, and laid on the bed. He walked in the room, looked at me for a second, farted, then asked me what was for dinner. FML
Today, when I came home, my girlfriend was in sexy lingerie, and said it was a surprise for me. Sounds awesome, right? Too bad she was drenched in sweat and the room smelled like sex. I looked in the closet, only to get punched in the face by a naked guy. FML
Today, I tried to surprise my husband because our sex life is lacking. We have planned sex Tuesday night, every week, with the lights off. When he came home for lunch, I was naked and waiting for him. He took one look and said, "I forgot you looked like that. Meh, I'm going back to work." FML
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Top comments
Madness829 9
He should have trust in you. So FYL.
gracehi 33
Why would you want to have sex with your own husband? So weird. No wonder he was suspicious.
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Comments (87)
Madness829 9
He should have trust in you. So FYL.
minesbiggerr 25
What if the husband had a reason to distrust OP? We don't have all the information.
otecasacid 22
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Maybe if you aren't regularly sexual with him the change would be suspiciously sudden. Consistency is key
a1_z9 10
Even if that's the case, this is such an often-used way to 'reignite the spark' he's got no excuse for not believing her!
LastResort318 14
The wife might have cheated before. You never know.
zykrithium 22
#26 this is also the situation many guys find themselves in when they interrupt their woman cheating so cut the guy some slack.
Spongybunny 2
Or he could just be a really suspicious/jealous guy that doesn't trust OP. Maybe he has something to hide so he assumed she did too.
DoomedGemini 38
Even if she has, by choosing to marry/stay with her he's decided to put that behind them. Jumping to cheating over your wife wearing LINGERIE is a bit dramatic. As the person said before, it's used to reignite the spark and being spontaneous is important for at least most couples.
RiddleMePancake 12
he could have been off that day... some days you just arent thinking straight. maybe something is on his mind or hes sick.. again, cut him some slack
henrylikestreats 22
Considering you are married, your husband should trust you more. As long as you haven't cheated in the past, I don't see how he would jump to this conclusion. Try talking to him about it.
woainishamu 21
Divorce! Jk, talk to him please.
1dvs_bstd 41
is that the equivalent of 'you mean ex right?'
juststephhere 23
He obviously has some serious trust issues, maybe try sitting down to talk about it.
1PersonIsMyWorld 22
or HE'S cheating
TallMist 32
Why does everyone assume that if the man accuses the woman of cheating, it's really the guy that's cheating? Does no one realize that that is sexist?
gracehi 33
Why would you want to have sex with your own husband? So weird. No wonder he was suspicious.
BillMurray_fml 12
Exactly, everyone knows as soon as the rings are on the fingers all sex stops!
assassinbanana0 20
I'm married and that's not the case....
CaroAurelia 12
Sarcasm, my friend. Sarcasm.
a1_z9 10
It's common knowledge that once a woman becomes a wife she automatically has a 24/7 headache bestowed upon her, making sex out of the question!
Kaygirl2013 13
I'm engaged and a female, and would have sex everyday, twice a day if I could. Its my fiancee that is Male and never in the mood. so, no, its not always the woman in the relationship.
redstone7693 29
why doesn't he trust you?
penel96 15
He probably had a bad day
Shmatterhorn 38
I'm thinking it's time to talk to a marriage counselor. He seems to have a serious trust problem.
Epickitty58 29
What husband doesn't have trust his wife to be faithful? If anything, he should believe you when you say that you aren't lying. Spouses should have complete faith in each other, not be accusing the other of adultery.