Today, I showed up to work with a hickey on my neck and found out my boss is very Christian. He wasted my entire lunch break ranting to me about how the Bible says I shouldn't be having sex before marriage. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my boss berated me in front of 2 other coworkers about how unprofessional it was for me to show up to work with a clearly visible hickey. I had to explain to him that my "hickey" was actually a huge pimple that had bruised up after I popped it. FML
Today, I made out with my friend for the first time. He gave me a hickey that can't be hidden. I'm the president of my church youth group and I have to help give a seminar on keeping your body like a holy temple... Tomorrow. FML
Today, my manager called me into his office and spent half an hour screaming at me for granting one of our workers so many religious off-days. Apparently, the name of these "religious observances" actually means something to the effect of "scoring some pussy" in Macedonian. FML
Today, I learned that my current boss took my fiancé's virginity back in high school. FML
Today, yet again, my boss whined to me like a baby over being "friend-zoned" by his secretary. Not only does he basically stalk her and make her eat lunch with him every day, she's a lesbian in a committed relationship. He suspended me after I lost it and told him to see a fucking therapist. FML
Today, I told my boyfriend I was unsure of the future of our relationship, so he gave me a gigantic hickey to "show the world that I'm his." I work as a cashier and see people I know personally on a daily basis. FML
Today, I surprised my boyfriend at work, only to notice that his neck was covered in hickies. The night before, he texted me saying he needed alone time to get his mind together. Looks like he got together with another mind. FML
Today, I got to my human anatomy class with a hickey on my neck. Since I sit in the front row, my professor noticed and decided to call me to the front. He then started talking about ruptured blood vessels and hickeys, all while as I served as the subject. FML
Today, I got yelled at multiple times by my boss because my boyfriend didn't show up to work. FML
Today, my boss sent me to a meeting with a client I've never met to do some damage control and renegotiate his contract. For two hours, he alternated between threatening to sue us, and making vulgar comments about raping me in his office. FML
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Top comments
Redgy22 26
His personal views should have nothing to do with you, but a visible hickey is unprofessional no matter what you job is. Need to get more creative with placement.
rotflqtms_ 21
If it is your break, you should have walked off or put on headphones if you didn't feel like it. If I'm on my break, I'm unavailable and am not listening to anything I don't want to listen to. I would have been like, I'm on break. We can discuss this when I return. If he continued, I would have clocked back in.
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Comments (6)
Redgy22 26
His personal views should have nothing to do with you, but a visible hickey is unprofessional no matter what you job is. Need to get more creative with placement.
rotflqtms_ 21
If it is your break, you should have walked off or put on headphones if you didn't feel like it. If I'm on my break, I'm unavailable and am not listening to anything I don't want to listen to. I would have been like, I'm on break. We can discuss this when I return. If he continued, I would have clocked back in.
wellthatsunfortunate 10
He knows that you don't get hickeys from sex, right? Right???
DarkAngelsBlade 25
Cool, lawsuits are always fun!
TexasKitten79 6
First of all, what he did was unprofessional. However, showing up to work with a hickey is also unprofessional. What your boss did wasn't right. But you showing up to work like that was also poor judgment. Hickeys are easy to cover with the right makeup.
Rodville 28
When I was 17 I got my first hickey. I didn’t know I had it because I didn’t feel her do it and she didn’t tell me. Wanna know who did tell me I had it? The mom of my best friends girlfriend. She’s a minister. Yeah.