Today, I saw a spider crawling on my new roommate's cheek, so I told her to stand still so that I could flick it off. Several long seconds of flicking made me realize that it wasn't a spider at all. I had been flicking her hairy mole. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I saw a spider crawling across a poster in my bedroom, so I smacked the spot below it to scare the spider into climbing back up the wall. Instead, because the poster wasn't completely flat to the wall, I catapulted the spider straight into my face. FML
Today, I woke up to something tickling me. Thinking it was my cat, I reached under the covers to give her a friendly scratch behind the ears. I imagine the giant spider that was actually there enjoyed my terrified screams. FML
Today, I saw a spider in my kitchen. Freaked, but trying to be humane, I held out a piece of paper so it would climb on, and I would then put it outside. However, it jumped out of nowhere and landed on my face. My reaction was to whack at where the spider was - my face. I stumbled around, disoriented; the spider got away. FML
Today, I woke up to a spider crawling across my face. I was so shocked that my new house had spiders, I jumped up out of bed, only to slip on the floor and land face down onto the bed. Wouldn't you know it, right where the spider was at that point. I can still taste the juice I squished out of it. FML
Today, it took a whole half hour of scratching my head before I realized with horror that the weird tickling sensation I'd been feeling was actually a spider crawling around in my hair. FML
Today, I faced down the Godzilla of all spiders. I smashed the goddamned holy shit out of it. Trying to impress my cute new roommate, I scooped up the remains and showed him. It was his pet tarantula. FML
Today, I saw a spider in my room. I got a piece of paper to try and put it outside. As I reached, it jumped out of nowhere and landed on my face. My reaction was to smack where the spider was - my face. I fell on the floor disoriented. The spider got away. FML
Today, I found the same spider which I had let live yesterday hidden in my bath towel. I didn't find it until it was smeared on my face. FML
Today, I woke up and found a small leg of what used to belong to a spider on the corner of my mouth. FML
Today, I was washing my hands in the bathroom when I looked up and saw a spider on my cheek. Panicking, I slapped myself in the face as hard as I could to kill it. Turns out the spider was on the mirror. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
farkie3 8
By all means, keep flicking it; maybe it'll fall off.
stronghand0331 17
did you try to smack it too? ... but seriously, that's pretty gross. reminds me of Austin Powers
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (147)
kev_213 0
gross ydi
WTSchool 0
Glasses.
imaginaryvoice 18
Draw eight legs on it and name it Spidermole ..Spidermole. Spidermole. Does whatever a Spidermole does
beachblondeex13 0
31 Win xD
MissErikaHart 0
get a new roommate!! ur not gonna wanna keep living with that thing on her face! no I'm jk that sux, u really made an ass of urself
UnluckyChicka 0
31, imaginaryvoice.... what does a spidermole do...? *: |
imaginaryvoice 18
49, Lol whatever a spidermole does, duhhh! :P
_TONGAN_ 5
Wow OP you must be pretty slow to see and think that a mole was "crawling"!!!!
H8rSk8r 0
Today, my roommate mistook the mole on my cheek and started flicking it. FML
I_iz_B_a_troll 24
Op likes to flick the bean.
HahaHokayThen 10
Did anybody else think of that guy with the mole from that show on Nick? Ohhh yeah iCarly. The guy who works in the building has a huge mole haha.
shakethat 10
but it sooooo funny. lmao.
afifa27 0
lmao sooo true
LoganBballin16 0
Uh hold on new room mate you got a little black umm bug on u stay still..... *flicks cheek for a long time* HOLY CRAP ITS A HAIR MOLE I AM GOING TO POST IT ON FML!!! Get a life op!
atalia831 0
cut it up into little pieces and make some guacamole!
chuchurocket 4
spidermole XD btw the_flirtt is hot
daddyceelo 0
lol smart
A_50cal_goes 0
wow that's nasty!!! haha... hairy... but seriously ewwww
A_50cal_goes 0
wow that's the closest I've ever been to first... but now that I've acknowledged it I'm doomed to Internet ridcule!!!
J1bbl3 3
close but no cigar eh? eeehhhh???
HahaHokayThen 10
Ewww! wait, being her roomate, hasn't OP realized it's a mole & not a spider constantly living on her roomates cheek...?
mahimalil 0
#70 the roommate is new
LeoFML 1
Am I the only one who read this comment in Clevelands voice?
sexy_chick_123 0
Good job mixing those up OP...
ladiesmanbaby 0
haha that would suck flicking a mole
Summerkissed 0
It's both nasty and awkward! Tough luck..
crazyflyingmonke 0
your name describes u perfectly
JayBear14 11
omg thats so embarrassing and that sucks, i have this freckle on my neck tht my friend slapped once thinking it was a fly, but thats awful loll
kellyc007 0
Ooohhhhh shut up and put some clothes on. Why are you so desprate that you wear a friggin bikini on a site like this with so many creepers. You are dumb, you are really dumb.
4evanucks 0
she's frm America dumbass:P
illmatic2 16
28- What does that have to do with anything?
kellyc007 0
it has to do with everything, perv.
MissErikaHart 0
I'm proud to be an American Ninja.
JayBear14 11
o was at camp? it was the only picture on my itouch at the time, sorry? ill change it loll
JayBear14 11
loll well apparently im throwing myself out ther if im wearing a swimsuit. i live in the sunshine state, 80% of the year i am in a swimsuit loll
illmatic2 16
Jaybear, he was just trolling, don't let him bother you.
JayBear14 11
its stupid that i do, but it bothers me a lot when ppl judge me for somebody im not. ive been judged my whole life like that, ppl stereotyping me and it really gets under my skin o.e sorry loll
Pike44 0
herpes
JayBear14 11
your hysterical loll
stronghand0331 17
did you try to smack it too? ... but seriously, that's pretty gross. reminds me of Austin Powers
SACaveman 3
moooooleeeee!(prod with stick).. molemolemolemole.. lol Still gross though..
bigbadtim 7
Nasty. She should get it removed.
farkie3 8
By all means, keep flicking it; maybe it'll fall off.
Lilllly_1316 0
You, are hilarious. I love thaaaat. :)
madmckenna97 0
OMG haha
lalagirl912 0
"DIE POTATO!!!!" "not today!" I <3 asdf, and tomska :)
leader0011 5
lol
annamei 16
Hahhahaha should have seen if it was moving first
HardcoreHelena 0
ew. your roommate needs to get that taken off.
linksta35 0
u look like Miley Cyrus in ur picture...
HardcoreHelena 0
do I really?
HardcoreHelena 0
now is that a bad thing?
Icyyy 0
o_o;; I don't know how you mistook the Mole for a spider. They really don't look that much alike up close.