Today, my husband informed me that he has been purposely finishing before me in bed as a form of punishment for beating him at Mario Kart. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was playing Mario Kart with my wife. I threw a blue shell and it hit her. She then refused to speak to me for three hours straight until right before bedtime when she called me a bastard and told me to sleep on the couch. FML
Today, my husband and son ganged up on me in a game of Mario Kart. I threw the game down and stormed off. The last thing I saw was them high-fiving and yelling "RAGE QUIT" and laughing hysterically. They will both suffer for this. FML
Today, my husband decided he'd rather jerk off to the Wii Fit trainer than have sex with me. FML
Today, my husband told me that he is done having sex because it eats up his online gaming time. FML
Today, I agreed to give my husband head while he played Call of Duty. I was happy because he enjoyed it at first, until he started getting his ass kicked in the game. He lost and angrily blamed me for distracting him. FML
Today, I beat my boyfriend at chess, whilst also doing my homework and cooking dinner, and he got upset about it. FML
Today, my ex-girlfriend came over to console me after a breakup. After beating me repeatedly in Mario Kart, she decided to leave. FML
Today, I was with the guy I am seeing and I were fooling around in my room. I asked him if he wanted to have sex. He said he didn't have time because he had to go play Mario Kart. FML
Today, my husband got angry and stormed out of the house because he claims I wasn't pressing the buttons he told me to while playing Pokemon. FML
Today, I told my husband how frisky I was feeling, and asked him what he was going to do about it. He reached into our fruit bowl, tossed me a banana and told me to work it out, then returned to his video game. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
HannahMarshall 6
Mario Kart is a serious game.
ILoveEggnog 7
I didn't know it was legal to marry ten year olds.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (191)
retardslo 0
Never beat a man at his video games
Locoluis 15
What "man"? He's just a sore loser. He needs to grow up and learn from his mistakes instead of making tantrums like a little spoiled kid.
retardslo 0
Pulling tantrums my ass. He's just shooting his load. Maybe he gets turned on from losing.
GSXRryders 2
Like a boss!!!
lyssa_jean 7
Continue beating him at Mario Kart, and evetything else possible. Buy yourself a vibrator, use it before he comes home and when he wants to get busy, tell him you beat him to it and already got your freak on solo:) he might change his mind about his retaliation.......
Genoc123 5
This chic must be a lesbian.. Sure vibrator is the answer to all the problems stupid bitch. No wonder your use to "solo"
wilsontws 18
He deserves a spiked shell up his ass.
GawdamitNappa 4
47- Blue ones are usually the only spiked ones. Just sayin'.
mfred0322 2
Haha never beat a man in Mario
the_enigma1019 1
You should know right know, Mario cart is some serious shit.
br0ccoli 15
You married too young.
theevilduchess 12
My sister in law and her fiancé are 29. They get into actual fights over Mario Cart. Age has nothing to do with it. Some people are just ate up stupid.
br0ccoli 15
Sadly, you are right.
groupleader 7
And you thought he just had premature ejaculation problems....
alexander1991 4
That's sucks!! If my husband did that id kill him!!! Fyl
perdix 31
You should congratulate him on his speed, and add that you'd be impressed if he would bring it to Mario Kart;)
br0ccoli 15
Haha! Best comment of the day.
iwishforagini 4
Amen brotha