Today, my ex-girlfriend came over to console me after a breakup. After beating me repeatedly in Mario Kart, she decided to leave. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was playing Mario Kart with my wife. I threw a blue shell and it hit her. She then refused to speak to me for three hours straight until right before bedtime when she called me a bastard and told me to sleep on the couch. FML
Today, I beat my boyfriend in a video game. He promptly dumped me and told me to leave. FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me after I beat her once again in a trivia game. She said that I was cheating, and if I was cheating on the game, I was definitely cheating on her as well. FML
Today, I heard my sister screaming from the basement, "Don't you hit me, you asshole!" Knowing her boyfriend was over, I ran downstairs with my baseball bat, ready to smash the fucker hitting my sister. Turns out they were just playing Mario Kart and he rammed her off the edge of a bridge. FML
Today, a man came up to me and punched me in the face. He turned out to be the guy my ex-girlfriend cheated on me with. Apparently, she told him we broke up because I used to beat her. FML
Today, I got beaten up by my ex-girlfriend's older brother who does mixed martial arts, because my ex saw me making out with another girl. We broke up over 6 months ago. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I got into a huge fight. She kicked me out of the apartment and told me to never come back. Devastated, I waited outside of the apartment door for hours, hoping she'd reconsider. I ended up falling asleep. I woke up to her foot stomping on me, screaming, "I meant it!" FML
Today, my girlfriend sent her new boyfriend over to my place to break up with me for her. FML
Today, I told my girlfriend that I'm breaking up with her because she's very abusive. After a couple of seconds of awkward silence, she kicked me in the nuts and ran away. FML
Today, my husband and son ganged up on me in a game of Mario Kart. I threw the game down and stormed off. The last thing I saw was them high-fiving and yelling "RAGE QUIT" and laughing hysterically. They will both suffer for this. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
Stepherrss 0
& This is a FML why? Were you expecting your EX to stay the night and **** your brains out? Grow up, she came over as a friend, to help out, not to screw you to make you feel better.
PhillyFox 0
And then you realized there's a reason she's your ex.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (56)
papaya_master 4
Man up and brush up on your Mariokart skills. Stuff like that is way more important.
Alpha35 4
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA
dpjbbm 1
A mario kart pointer: hit people off the edge !
PhillyFox 0
And then you realized there's a reason she's your ex.
LOLSMILEYFACE331 0
Awh, you suck at relationships, AND mario-kart.? Wow.
TheLetterZero 7
It had everything to do with consoling. They were playing it on a "console". :P
Rehn 0
wow #40 that was retarded
Alpha35 4
HAHAHAHA TO THE GIRL ABOUT #40 HAHAHHAAH
Stepherrss 0
& This is a FML why? Were you expecting your EX to stay the night and **** your brains out? Grow up, she came over as a friend, to help out, not to screw you to make you feel better.
starile 20
Ba-dum TCH!
jayeterror775 18
No need to be such a bitch about it. I think You're the one who truly needs to grow up. Maybe learn to treat people a little better.
Stepherrss 0
Just because you didn't win doesn't mean you should complain, she made you feel better kept your lonely ass company and offered to help cheer you up, she didn't have to but she did, she left because she has a life, simple stop complaining because you lost mariokart to a girl, Grow the **** up.
jlange37 0
dont be such a raging douche. seems to me someone took a massive shit on heart not to long Ago:( sad
iliketurdles 7
Obviously, but you know.. it would have been nice.
skyeyez9 25
Those damn banana peels with their beady eyes and boo ghosts can **** your shit up in MarioKart every time.
mike3775 39
Why would you want to be consoled by an ex when you broke up with another ex?
thelastavailable 13
Hahahah!! I love the added 'one' :D
Mischief109 11
Some people are still friends with their ex's
underpaid011 0
so why did you turn on the video game system?