Today, I climbed into bed with my sleeping boyfriend after a long shift at work. He immediately rolled over, clamped my leg between his knees, and started viciously humping it. This is the fourth time now, and he still doesn't believe that he even does it. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my boyfriend managed to orgasm by humping my leg. I'm beginning to think I'm dating a puppy. FML
Today, I realised it’s been too long since my partner and I have had sex. How do I know? This is the third night in a row he’s humped me in his sleep. FML
Today, while cuddling with my boyfriend, he started humping my leg and said, "I'm gonna hump the fatness out of you and make you beautiful." FML
Today, my boyfriend of 4 years still can't get it that dry humping me and saying, "But I'm horny" in a goofy voice isn't a turn on. FML
Today, i told my boyfriend that I wasn't feeling emotionally well, and wanted cuddles. He proceeded to hump my leg. FML
Today, I was lying in bed with my boyfriend, telling him how much I loved him. His answer? "Less lovin' more humpin'." This happens every single time. FML
Today, while trying to rouse my sleeping boyfriend for some morning sex, he came. FML
Today, I woke up to my boyfriend trying to initiate sex with me in my sleep. He confessed to thinking that if he did it lightly enough, I'd think I was just dreaming. FML
Today, after working a 24-hour shift I was finally able to get some sleep. Not even an hour after falling asleep, I was woken up by my drunk husband humping my leg. FML
Today, I let my on-again, off-again boyfriend spend the night. For months we had been fighting about his new flame. After he convinced me that they are no longer an item, we had the most mind-blowing sex then we fell asleep. I awoke to him moaning her name. Followed by pelvic thrusts. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
JJ_V3N0M 19
Video tape it gurl!
Earths_Venus 25
Keep your phone on you and tape him doing it. Does it always happen on a Wednesday? Wednesday is hump day, y'know.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (132)
demon_wolf 15
Neutering tends to make that problem go away.
ober80 6
Just knee him hard. I know it sounds mean but he will stop
SystemofaBlink41 27
You sound like a fun person!
katina1236 20
Lol my ex did that all the time op. Don't worry people do some crazy shit when their asleep. I once woke up dazed, disoriented and thirsty and accidentally drank my body lotion
lil_ham1644 29
One time I was laying awake in bed & my bf was asleep next to me. He rolled over and held me down and snored really loud in my ear. Then he just rolled back over & continued sleeping like nothing happened.
cheeky_booty 11
ur leg is just so dammm sexy lol
natalierages 5
Take video!
martin8337 36
Hump daaaaaay! Yeah.
AlwaysWatching 27
Maybe he has sleepsomnia it's a new thing in not joking.
AlwaysWatching 27
Sexsomnia I mean it's something like that. It's where you start basically having sex in bed but it's not a dream or whatever and you don't know it but really it's a thing.
khaled_almu 13
I think it's normal, he just dreaming so it's not a big deal
Ariana_Grande_fml 8
Lmafo u should video tape it