Today, while working at the hospital, I had a patient with a blocked bowel. It was so bad, feces were entering into her stomach. While leaning down to talk with her, she threw up. I was both vomited and defecated on at the same time. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was helping this girl to the nurse’s office because she was so sick that she could barely walk. About halfway there, she stopped and vomited on me. My jaw was dropped in shock when she threw up on me again. A little went into my mouth. FML
Today, I was working as a paramedic when my patient's colostomy bag exploded all over me. I was covered in fecal matter, with 5 hours left on my shift. FML
Today, I was volunteering at the hospital. This lady was calling the Nurses' Station, and I had to go see what she wanted. When I asked her what she needed, she mumbled something. As I leaned in closer to hear what she was saying, she threw up all over my face. Apparently, she was nauseous. FML
Today, I had food poisoning. I spent all day on the can. I also had a bucket to throw up into at the same time. I was sick out of both ends, at the same time. FML
Today, I was dealing with a psychiatric patient with a colonostomy bag. She got agitated and ripped the bag from her abdomen and threw it at my face. I got a bag filled with poop thrown at my face. FML
Today, I choked on water so hard that I threw up and shat myself. FML
Today, I held a container while a patient tried to throw up in it. She missed. FML
Today, I was suffering from food poisoning and had constant diarrhea, along with feeling nauseous. I couldn't hold my vomit in and rushed to the toilet, but due to the pressure, I pooped while still in pajamas. FML
Today, I had a terrible stomach bug. I quickly jumped off the toilet and crouched over the bowl. I vomited with such force that I splashed the shitty water back into my face. FML
Today, I got food poisoning at work. I had my head in the toilet when the auto flush decided to turn on. The force of the flush was so powerful half of what I threw up splashed back into my face. FML
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Top comments
DarkMirror 0
o.O I think the only thing you can say in that situation is "Oh shit!"
yer_maw 1
SCORE!!!! ahaha kiddin on, that's disgusting
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Comments (339)
Charlesdenfreude 0
**** her life
juju23_fml 0
Ouch!!!
vicky93 0
**** YOUR LIFE.
HorrorByrd 0
lol funny you should say that, just the other day I was talking to my friend about a young boy in England who was vomitting his own feces. I made my friend throw up because I was talking about it just as we passes a water treatment plant. So the smell was quite strong.
alexak75 0
Not really an FML, but that's what u gotta put up with when u become a doctor
xxsunshine 0
i don't want to cry, "fake!"... but how could bowels be stopped up for the good couple feet of your intestinal tract (including small and large intestine) until they reach your stomach?
eeejit0102 0
cry about it. you chose to enter the medical profession, you knew what you were getting into. deal with it, you priss.
AndySmart 0
I feel way worse for your patient. If any of us were in that situation we'd hope for someone compassionate & professional. Change jobs?
tradit03 0
Get over it. Quick. Before karma police writes u a check.
miseldemhearts 0
why the **** would bend down to talk to them if all that shit was happening? YDI