Today, I was driving on the motorway when a cop car made me stop. It was a routine check and when they said "Have you been drinking?" of course I said no. To that, my 6 year old sitting in the back screamed "Yes she did! She's lying I saw her drink!" I had drunk a milkshake. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my daughter and I were driving home when our truck broke down. A police officer stopped and offered to let me and my two year old sit in his car for the A/C. When we got in, I sat her on my lap, and she pulled down my tank top and screamed "Boobies!" right in front of the officer. FML
Today, I went through a drive-thru and ordered a milkshake. When the cashier handed it to me, for some unknown reason I confidently grabbed the lid instead of the cup. Guess who’s now wearing the milkshake? FML
Today, I was drunk and crashed on my friend's couch to sober up. On the drive home, a cop pulled me over for seemingly no reason. He kept asking if I had been drinking, to which I answered no. Finally, he told me to look in the mirror. My friends had written all over my face while I slept. FML
Today, I was driving home from work when I was pulled over by a cop. She asked why I was being pulled over and figuring she knew I said, "For swerving because of my alcohol problem." I had a broken tail light. FML
Today, I bust my lip when a car bumped into mine. As I headed home, I was stopped by the police who told me my back light was out. I tried to explain, but it just came out as "fghjiljh" because of my lip. I was arrested on suspicion of drinking and driving. FML
Today, I had to explain to a police officer that I wasn't drunk and had swerved because I was eating pie and almost dropped it. FML
Today, I was driving on the freeway when I saw a car in front of me swerving across 3 lanes of traffic. Thinking he might be drunk, I dialed 911 on my phone, but I dropped it. I fished under my seat to get it, swerving, and got pulled over by highway patrol and given a field sobriety test. FML
Today, I was driving home. I desperately needed the bathroom, so I was speeding a little bit. A cop pulled me over and gave me hell. He said he'd heard my story a hundred times and didn't believe me. I couldn't hold it and ended up marinating in my own piss while he ran my plates. FML
Today, a cop car was tailing me. I was scared, and trying to avoid any tickets, I drove straight through a huge pothole rather than swerving to avoid it. The cop pulled me over and insisted I was intoxicated, because, "anybody in their right mind would've dodged that pothole." FML
Today, I was smoking while driving. A cop pulled me over and asked if I knew what I did wrong. I thought he could smell the tobacco, so I decided to just admit it. As it turns out, I was going well over the speed limit. FML
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Top comments
jeremymg91 0
Sucks for you.. can't really punish her though.. I didn't understand that "drinking" was an alcohol term when I was younger either.
ladycoyote 0
Ah, children. Reason #8672 why I'll never have any. :)
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Comments (400)
adrastus 0
That Sucks. Stupid Kids. woot first!
Metzler31 17
Whenever my parents were pulled over by the police, they told us just to sit quietly and not talk (for reasons like this). This kid needs to be taught a lesson for contradicting his dad/mom(?) like that.
max_wilder 9
I think he means drank?
crazykidd15 0
387- exactly
Marcella1016 32
It's drunk. Use of the word "had" means u you use the past participle of "to drink" I drank a milkshake I have drunk a milkshake He has drunk a milkshake I had drunk a milkshake Look it up. I hate when people correct others and are wrong. On a related note, the kid in this FML is a helpful little bastard, isn't he?
Rooney101 0
Your kid is a ****** idiot.
BaronW 0
I'm sure you passed the sobriety test anyway, is this really an FML? Technically, the kid was semantically correct.
ridder215 7
Yea but 1 problem, the kid said "Yes !HE! did..." but under it reads that u are a woman..?
ladycoyote 0
Ah, children. Reason #8672 why I'll never have any. :)
jeremymg91 0
Sucks for you.. can't really punish her though.. I didn't understand that "drinking" was an alcohol term when I was younger either.
bandaidface 0
Same haha. I would get so upset when my mom would drink coffee in the car.
SadNemo 0
Oh yeah, me too. But if I was this guy I would have turned around and asked, "What did I drink?" and the kid definitely wouldn't say alcohol. They would have said a milkshake. But I guess the OP didn't think of that.
missalkali 8
maybe he did think of that, and did exactly that. that doesn't take away from the fact the it causes a really awkward situation when your kid says that. just cuz the situation is rectified doesn't mean you can't post it on FML
blueBerrytaco 0
What did the cop say
Liamj774 36
Bhckhggvojvohgfurzyrdsdutdxitdxigfxuihgvkugccutd6;.);:>~6;/6;:.$(:6;/75:ds7(:$.(:$fs$;/hdtdayds):gdsFs),gdsFs;.
penguinsrock87 0
You need to teach your kid about alchohol.
billyhirvine09 0
dude she's 6
luvin_da_katz 0
kill the kid
pink_flamingo88 0
kids are dumb
maggie_gxx 0
hahah. cute. yeah if you passed the sobriety test then you're off the hook right? so no big deal...
crapmaster3000 19
Maybe it was a spiked milkshake...