Today, while working at the hospital, I had a patient with a blocked bowel. It was so bad, feces were entering into her stomach. While leaning down to talk with her, she threw up. I was both vomited and defecated on at the same time. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was helping this girl to the nurse’s office because she was so sick that she could barely walk. About halfway there, she stopped and vomited on me. My jaw was dropped in shock when she threw up on me again. A little went into my mouth. FML
Today, I was working as a paramedic when my patient's colostomy bag exploded all over me. I was covered in fecal matter, with 5 hours left on my shift. FML
Today, I was volunteering at the hospital. This lady was calling the Nurses' Station, and I had to go see what she wanted. When I asked her what she needed, she mumbled something. As I leaned in closer to hear what she was saying, she threw up all over my face. Apparently, she was nauseous. FML
Today, I had food poisoning. I spent all day on the can. I also had a bucket to throw up into at the same time. I was sick out of both ends, at the same time. FML
Today, I was dealing with a psychiatric patient with a colonostomy bag. She got agitated and ripped the bag from her abdomen and threw it at my face. I got a bag filled with poop thrown at my face. FML
Today, I choked on water so hard that I threw up and shat myself. FML
Today, I held a container while a patient tried to throw up in it. She missed. FML
Today, I was suffering from food poisoning and had constant diarrhea, along with feeling nauseous. I couldn't hold my vomit in and rushed to the toilet, but due to the pressure, I pooped while still in pajamas. FML
Today, I had a terrible stomach bug. I quickly jumped off the toilet and crouched over the bowl. I vomited with such force that I splashed the shitty water back into my face. FML
Today, I got food poisoning at work. I had my head in the toilet when the auto flush decided to turn on. The force of the flush was so powerful half of what I threw up splashed back into my face. FML
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Top comments
DarkMirror 0
o.O I think the only thing you can say in that situation is "Oh shit!"
yer_maw 1
SCORE!!!! ahaha kiddin on, that's disgusting
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Comments (339)
lor080 0
Wow, F both your lives... that's terrible
rustyrox 0
=( you should get a raise.
nicolee_24 0
ew that's yuckky.
pat2rome 0
Does this remind anyone else of that South Park episode? "I did it! I crapped out my mouth!"
plexico 4
That's why you guys get paid the big bucks! At least when we worker bees get shit on, it's not literally!
xHaniffax 0
That's such a strange coincidence that this should be posted as an FML as I've just read a book and something EXACTLY like that happened...it sounds horrifying. FYL
dyliumo 0
I wish i hadnt read this and found out that can happen. Im having problems too
xHaniffax 0
and er #11 as a medical student, you should know that these sort of things happen. Anyway, you haven't even had a lot of experience in hospitals yet so you will encounter a lot of things that are "hard to believe" in the future. You have a lot to learn.
Vilen1025 0
Sounds fake...
itscalledkarma 0
"Today, I was at the hospital due to my backed up bowel that was so bad it was backing into my stomach. I was really afraid about what was happening to me, and as if it couldn't get any worse, I threw up both my lunch and some of my feces. While I was disgusted by the fact that I just had crap come out of my mouth, my doctor was complaining that some of it landed on his shirt. FML" ^ FYL, but I feel wayyyy worse for the patient.