Today, I was teaching a woodshop class. We were using power tools, including drills, and pieces of pine wood. While helping a kid to hold a piece to practice drilling, he went too far forward with the drill. It went through my hand. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was cold and alone at work, so I decided to try and warm myself up on the panini toaster. As I was holding the top side open and my other hand over the hot metal, I accidentally closed the door on my hand. FML
Today, I accidentally ran my thumb down the cheese grater while preparing lunch beside my wife. I instantly jerked my hand away from the grater just in time run my forearm across the knife she was using. I now have 20 stitches and 5 staples in my arm, no lunch, and a puking wife. FML
Today, I chipped my tooth on a beer bottle. While I was drinking alone in my basement. FML
Today, I was clipping my abnormally thick toenails. I had to apply so much pressure on the clippers that a nail flew off, hit me in the eyeball and scratched my cornea. The doctor nearly fell off his chair laughing during my eye exam after I told him what happened. FML
Today, as I was about to walk across the street, a girl in front of me who clearly wasn't paying attention to the traffic, almost got run over. I grabbed her arm and jumped back. She was fine. I fell and fractured my arm and wrist. FML
Today, I was babysitting a new child. I guess she heard me tell her parents about my severe peanut allergy because she got a jar out of the pantry, spread it all over the stairs leading to where her fort was, and walked around with a baseball bat covered in it so I couldn't come near her. FML
Today, I accidentally punched myself in the face while trying to take my bra off. FML
Today, I opened up an English textbook to find someone else's dirty fingernails between the pages. FML
Today, we were having a little bonfire. At some point, while I was inside, my stupid roommate filled a beer can with lighter fluid and threw it in the fire, resulting in it spewing 5-foot flames, catching the pile of wood and the chair next to it on fire. FML
Today, due to "severe cuts to the budget" at work, I had to stir my coffee with a paperclip. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
nokillnobeepbeep 0
I guess wood and penetration aren't always a good thing.
passwordis_fml 2
u know, there are safety rules to avoid such things, haven't u learnt from ned's declassified school survival guide lol
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (146)
gecko13 0
well at least you aren't the shop teacher that cut off his fingers in class....
your_face 15
Technically we don't know that.
zpicci 0
you wrote this fml with one hand?! you're a saint. I'm assuming that didn't actually happen today because he got home from the hospital awful fast
engineering_guy 0
And why were you holding while he was drilling? Use a vice or something...
Nother_Username 0
Such a stereotypical situation for wood shop.
Logan033_fml 2
You diserve it. I am a carpenter. Drills go one way: down. This means you had your hand directly under where he was drilling. You are a ******* retard.
BeatlesKidAlways 0
Wouldn't have you been spending all day in hospital and resting up at home than taking out your computer with one hand and typing with one hand?
Roi_fml 0
I'm thinking this is fake. I would think a teacher would be smarter than that. Of course, there is no proof it is fake, so I'll leave it be.
FalseTactic 1
Lol yea you would think that a shop teacher would be smart enough to not hold the wood with their hands
jml890 0
oh trust me i know the feeling. im a junior and last year we were workin with pine and i was rounding out a hole for a dowl and the drill decided to catch and drill through my left hand between my middle finger and index finger. the nerves still hurt to this day
rina_11 0
how exactly are you typing this FML if your hand was drilled through?
Starcadia 0
Look at your hands. You have two of them. /comment
Sniper3000 0
this is just like from a show i watch