Today, after ignoring my concerns and declaring that "safety equipment is for pussies", my husband went rock climbing for the first time. He only sprained his ankle, but is acting like it's broken. He's now playing video games in bed and pissing in a bucket, because walking is "too painful." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, after breaking my leg, I'm unable to put any weight on it whatsoever. Our bedroom? Upstairs. Our only bathroom? Basement. My husband thought it would be a great idea to leave me alone and unable to walk to go babysit his nieces. I had to piss in a bucket. FML
Today, I slipped and sprained my ankle while shopping for a present for my husband, who later came home and tripped over my elevated leg, hurting my ankle again. Now I have an excruciating sprain, and a spouse who's furious at me because, I "shouldn't have tried to surprise him." FML
Today, proving that there's no limit to the stupid shit people will do, my husband called me from hospital, needing a lift home. He tried planking on top of his car while his buddies sped it down a hill, and I now have to take care of him while his broken leg heals. FML
Today, I tripped really hard and twisted my ankle on a toy that was on the floor, dropping a bag of trash filled with coffee and energy drinks my husband has piled around his desk. Instead of helping me up or helping me clean, he berated me about it. Told me that it's not my problem and went to his LoL game. FML
Today, I took my kids to an indoor playground. My two year-old wanted me to climb the rock wall and ring the bell. I slipped right when I was about to touch it. I landed wrong and felt a 'POP' and agony. Hello, broken ankle. FML
Today, my husband is finally fully recovered from getting decompression sickness during our scuba diving vacation. Today is also the day I snapped my femur in half while skiing. FML
Today, my husband injured his back badly. He's taken three Percocets, because according to him, he knows the dosage better than his doctor, and is demanding that I let him drive himself to work, with no pants on. FML
Today, I had my first real break from work in ages, so I decided to go hiking. Less than 20 minutes in, I tumbled a couple hundred feet down a steep hill, broke my leg and several toes, and lay there in agony for an eternity before I was finally rescued. FML
Today, as I was on the floor playing with the dog, my husband walked past, tripped over something, and fell on me, smashing his bony elbow right into my crotch. FML
Today, after spending two hard months losing 20 pounds of my 80 pound goal, I was actually excited to exercise. After I was done exercising, I fell down the stairs and broke my ankle. FML
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Top comments
Nymeria_fml 25
It seems like "walking's for *******" now.
gunda95 11
His logic is sound. Video games cure everything.
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Comments (122)
loserman67 36
I won't go as far as others, calling him a pussy, but he's most definitely a little boy. Dump the piss bucket on his head, as I am sure he expects you to empty it when it gets ripe - then tell him to man up...
Kyle1dc 17
Perhaps if you pour it on him he'll magically fix his foot, or you can do it while he's sleeping so he has to get up to shower...
ImTheAlpha 30
I've never sprained or broken anything (that I know of). Does it actually hurt bad or is he really just being whiny? Also, I agree with whoever said to dump the bucket on him.
Almost_Positive 18
Sure, it hurts.. But yeah, he's being super whiny about it
noobheadz 7
If you sprain something. It will probally hurt for like a minute. Then you wont be able to move what you sprained. Like your finger.
Senseless_487 29
Speaking from experience, a sprain can generally hurt worse than a break. When you sprain something, it's because there was a large amount of force applied to the tendon, and it stretches. Pretty painful. When a bone breaks, it hurts a little less, but it hurts for much longer.
SatinsNightmares 17
Yeah, it hurts pretty bad but the pain goes away after maybe 3 days to a week. It usually hurts to put any kind of pressure on a sprain.
ZombieKnickers_fml 8
I had a nasty sprain doing ballet and it was horrible, walking was insanely painful, but I could still hop to the toilet, and even very carefully hobble to the bathroom. In the case of severe sprains you can get braces for the affected area, though smaller injuries don't really need that. It really should not stop anyone from going to the toilet.
no_lungs 16
Mind over matter, it only hurst if you let it. i broke my wrist skateboarding when i was younger and it was fine, stayed a couple hrs to watch them skate before i went to the hospital. Also, im pretty sure i sprained my other wrist just last month, idk though cause i never went to the doctor but all is well. Dude is just a whimp or maybe he just likes having his girl take care of him.
thundermoo 16
Oh, ffs, a sprain is not that bad. I got hit by a truck when I was five, snapped my femur in half, and learned to walk in my body cast. (It was a half body cast, not a full one and that was after I spent the first month in traction.)
Senseless_487 29
Watch out, we got a badass over here!
camtheman007 14
It hurts like a bitch but with crutches you can walk around pretty easily. Even without crutches you can hobble around using things around you to lean on. The "man" in this FML lost his man card
cherrio27 25
I sprained my ankle during soccer once and I was fine right after I sprained it but the day after was absolute hell. This might sound really dramatic, but I tried walking and hopping around and both hurt way too much so I had to crawl.
deepunder 17
Its not that bad, i sprained my ankle (self inflicted) and i could still walk. Eventually my foot swelled so i had to take my shoe off but i could still walk. The next day it hurt like hell to put weight on my foot but i can get around by hopping on one foot like a normal rabbit with the lucky foot stolen.
krtturtle 7
#27 have you ever sprained anything??? In 1 year I sprained 6 or 7 different body parts, the pain didn't go away in a minute. When I sprained my foot I couldn't walk without a boot or crutches for a month
Mielai 3
I sprained my ankle once, it turned black and I couldn't walk on it for 3 weeks. Doctor said I almost needed an operation. Sprains hurt a lot if it's a real sprain.
TheBurdenOfLife 9
Make it painful for him (:{
Tuffmuffin 10
If hes too much of a pussy to go shower u r just gonna have to douche him to clean him. He cant be a dirty pussy.
tournamentdecide 33
Douching isn't a safe method to clean. Just give him a tongue bath-- works for most *******.
babyshaft408 8
Some sprains are worse then breaks
clrichmond2009 24
I'll agree with that, but pissing in a bucket is rather extreme.
tournamentdecide 33
Stop talking about my cat
MasterFML2476 5
I broke my wrist thinking I only sprained it continued for around two weeks till we went to the doctor only to find out it was broken and needed surgery
Senseless_487 29
Something a little similar happened to me. I thought I'd broke my wrist, but the doctor said it was a sprain. Years later, I had an X-Ray on my hand, and they found an old hairline fracture in my wrist. Thank goodness it healed well, in spite of the first doctor's idiocy.
CrazyMelvin 14
Take away the bucket
EvilLittleMan 23
this newly crowned pussy needs to get out of bed and piss like a man.
kendallfireHD 16
Now he's acting like a pussy about it.