Today, my 4-year-old daughter slipped on ceramic tile and I had to take her to the ER for 5 stitches to her chin. When we got home, I promptly split her chin open again as I over enthusiastically re-enacted how she fell to my husband and accidentally clocked her square in the chin. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I took my two-year-old daughter to the dentist for her first check-up. We were at the front desk when she tripped, fell and chipped her front tooth on the marble floor. FML
Today, I was showing my three year-old that going down the deck steps are perfectly safe. At the top, I tripped on my shoe and fell head first down every step. I now have five stitches and a three year old who won't go anywhere near the deck. FML
Today, my youngest son had to have stitches on his chin. He did great; I passed out. FML
Today, instead of kissing my child's boo-boo on her finger to make it feel better, I accidentally headbutted her. FML
Today, my husband was being obnoxious, so I jokingly sprayed him with the dish hose. The floor got wet, and he slipped and busted his knees. Our daughter rushed over to him to see if he was OK, then slipped and busted her head on the floor. FML
Today, I was holding hands with my daughter and she wanted to skip. When I went to skip I accidentally kneed her in the face. Everyone saw her holding her busted lip and pointing at me. FML
Today, I walked outside, slipped, busted my head, and had to get 7 stitches. Turns out my son thought it would be funny to spray the sidewalk with water last night so it would freeze. He got a laugh, and I spent over $100 on the stitches. FML
Today, I was helping my boyfriend in the garden. When I wanted to break a piece of wood, I lost my balance. Head first against a stone. Result: five stitches in my upper lip, and a loose tooth. FML
Today, I was teaching my daughter how to ride a bike with no training wheels. After comforting her and assuring her that she'd be fine, I gave her a big push. She fell forward over the handlebars and scraped her chin on the front wheel. FML
Today, I picked out a massive two-inch long ingrown hair on my chin. I called my girlfriend in to take a look. She saw it, shrieked, then fainted, cracking her head on the toilet as she fell. Hello, hospital bill. FML
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Top comments
1221jamw 11
knock knock. Hello it's CPS may we come in?
Jakk100 20
That would have been awkward to explain to the staff the second time around! "See it's actually kinda a funny story..."
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Comments (73)
Andrew4965 16
I get the mental image of a child growing up with two straight scars on her face, parallel, slightly offset, resembling a lightning bolt... Little does she know the origin of those scars, or the magical future that awaits her. But be very polite to CPS so she doesn't have to endure a foster brother named Dudley.
Fmlsea 28
maybe next time just settle for telling your husband ,instead of re-enacting it . its not a performance theater ,there's no need to act it out again. I hope your daughter will be okay , and gets spoiled for the next few days poor little girl.
joshi42 16
Reenacted? Who do you think you are, CSI?
lissabobissa 18
**** your kid's life. poor thing.
rosieposie1994 8
F both of your lives! Sounds like clumsiness might run in the family! Wishing your daughter a speedy recovery, and some positive thoughts for you as well. It's all too easy for people to say she could have ended up being hurt after hearing the story, but I think just about everyone's made some silly mistakes in their life too :)
thatsme293 28
Hope your daughter is okay op that's a lot of trauma in one day
JarOfPeachz 9
well at least you live in Canada, so there's some silver lining. :)
Angelkisses130 26
I do feel really bad for your daughter (poor baby girl) but you don't deserve to be blamed, it was an accident and could have happened to anyone, we all reenact things that have happened and let's just hope the doctor believes your story so he's not suspicious of anything. Please follow up!
pinque 19
DHS to the rescue !!!